That’s life…

November 11, 2022

This quote was at the top of an email that I got this morning which was probably advertising something. I like it because it takes an active view of making life better, rather than a passive view.

One could spend (waste) a lot of time in the passive mode of hoping and dreaming about how life could be, but those who actually achieve those dreams are the ones that take action to make their dream happen. It is through the doing that we turn “I wish I was” into “I am.”

So instead of spending more time this morning hoping and wishing for a better life, maybe take a few moments to ask for God’s help doing the things that you need to do to become that better person. A simple prayer like, “God help me make better decisions today and help me become a better person” can set the stage for the successes that you desire.  

At the end of the day, if you can look back and feel good about the decisions that you made and the way that you comported yourself you will feel a sense of accomplishment that surpasses the achievement of greater wealth or power. You may also notice that the things that make you feel the best about yourself were things that you did to make someone else’s life better – a kind gesture or effort to help someone else, to complement them, or otherwise engage them.

Life is not lived in the vacuum of self, which is the lonely realm of hoping and dreaming; life is lived within the context of society in which “we” is more important than “me”. We are told in the Bible –

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”  (Philippians 2:3-4)

It is not enough to wish that the other person has a better day or to hope that someone would open that door for them; it is up to you to do thigs to make the day better for them and in so doing to have a better day and become a better person yourself.

That’s life.


Think about it…

May 26, 2022

In his blog, Jack’s Winning Words, Pastor Freed used this quote today from Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius – “When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” 

Freed reported that Aurelius is often referred to as the last “good” emperor of Rome and his thoughts were captured in a book on his Meditations that Freed studied in his philosophy class.

We live in a world in which taking the time to think about life as Aurelius advised is rare. The fast pace of modern life and the overload of information that we are now inundated with in any given day gives us little time to appreciate the privilege of another day of life. It is only when lives are abruptly ended in incidents like the recent mass shootings that we take the time to appreciate how fragile life is and how thankful we should be for each day.

It is also in those moments of grief and sorrow that we realize how many opportunities we missed to enjoy life and to share our love with others. Story after story coming out of life ending tragedies come from people relating the last time that they talked to or hugged the person that is now gone and how they wish that they had done that more often.

If you stop each morning and think about how precious life is, you might be incented to make sure that you find a way to touch those that you love each day. It may not be an in-person visit, but a call or writing a letter to them is still a touch.

So, stop and think this morning and every morning about how precious life is. Be thankful that God has given you another day and think about how you can make the most of that time. Stopping to think about the preciousness of life each morning also puts you in a better frame of mind to make decisions during the day. It helps you set your priorities and gets your focus on interpersonal relationships and not upon things like money or power.

Another of Aurelius’ sayings seems also appropriate once one has stopped to appreciate life – “If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.” There are two simple rules to live by that will make the day better.

Think about it.


Look at life in a different way…

April 25, 2021

“When you look in a different way…you find different things.” – Kris Stanek. Stanek is co-author of a study by scientists at Ohio State University who recently discovered a small black hole that they dubbed “The Unicorn”, which is the closest black hole to Earth yet discovered. The Ohio State scientists looked at the distortion of a red gas giant star only 1500 light years from earth differently than previous observers had and proved the existence of the black hole that is paired with it is causing the distortion.

You don’t have to be a scientist to look at things and life differently. Rather than accept what at the time was the conventional wisdom about the distortion of the star, the Ohio State scientists postulated a different explanation, a different way of looking at it and set out to prove their theory.  

I was for a while on the board of our local Community Coalition group, a group whose mission is to try to keep kids off drugs and alcohol. We would occasionally participate in various health fairs in the area with a booth. One of the most popular things that we did in the booth involved a simulation of the effect of alcohol on vision. We used a special set of goggles with lenses that distort one’s vision the way being drunk can distort it. We asked the participants to place simple shaped pieces into the proper place in a board with cut outs for those pieces. They couldn’t do it, because the goggles distorted their view of the board and the pieces.

We all “see” life through various lenses that can distort how we see things. The lenses that we look at life thorough might be called our attitude towards life.  Some see life through the lenses of prejudices and hate. For them, life is a dark and angry place to be railed against. Some see life through the lenses of fear, uncertainly and doubt. For them life is a scary place, indeed. Many just see things with some form of “conventional wisdom” in mind, never stopping to challenge the source or accuracy of that wisdom.

It is not my intent here to go into depth about attitude and how it effects one’s view of life; but, rather, to raise the flag that it can have an impact and that one needs to stop and question why they are reacting to something or someone in a certain way. We all need to ask ourselves if we are looking at things through lenses that ae distorting our view – fear, hate, prejudice or some other lens. Then ask yourself if there is a different way to “see” the situation, maybe even from the perspective of the other person. Just stopping to question your own reaction or thoughts will force you to think about it before reacting. – and that is a good thing.

If you need a new way of looking at things, try this from the Bible –

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” (Romans 12:2)

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” (Philippians 4:8)

Maybe having a little reminder close at hand would help. Many find those little bracelets with the letters WWJD embossed on them help. It is hard to come up with a hateful answer to the question, “What Would Jesus Do?”

If you look at life through the Jesus lens it will look a lot brighter to you and will become a happier place to be.

 What lenses will you look at life through today?


The secret to a good life…

March 6, 2021

I always get a kick out of seeing a headline like that; as if there is really some great unknown secret that will immediately make life better, if only it were revealed to us. While there is no secret to a good life, there are bits of advice that we can pick up from others and implement in our own lives to make them better. One such piece of advice I got from a post to my usual source – the Jack’s Winning Words blog – “Laugh when you can; apologize when you should; and let go of what you can’t change.”  (Posted by Carrie Goldring)

The other piece of advice comes from French philosopher Albert Camus – “To be happy, we must not be too concerned with others.”

Our ability to laugh, especially at ourselves, is a great release from the stresses of everyday life and a necessary pause in the intensity that we sometimes put on ourselves in life. The ability to admit mistakes, own them, and apologize for them or make them right is also a necessity. Only through that process can we forgive ourselves get them off our backs. Finally, the ability to recognize those things in life that one cannot change and let go of them is critical. Our faith helps with that by allowing us to give those things to God in the simple prayer, “Not my will, but thy will be done.”

And then there is the advice of Camus. I don’t think he was saying not to be empathetic to the needs of others so much as not to be hung up on what others think about you or what you do. Many people spend an inordinate amount of time being concerned about the answer to the question, “What will others think?” before and after they do something. Even getting dressed in the morning usually involves that question for those people. Camus is saying that happiness does not come from others, but rather from within ourselves.

There are phrases that ae used within or vocabularies that point to the answer of living a good life – phrases like, “I laughed so hard that I cried” or “Those are tears of happiness”. Those phrases are describing examples of those moments in life that we let go of all else and live in the moment. We enjoy life. I have also heard the phrase, “I never felt more alive than at that moment” to describe some wonderful event in someone’s life.

Perhaps that is the secret to the good life. Again, I point to another quote from Albert Camus that sums this up very nicely – “Live to the point of tears.”

So the secret to the good life is to stop worrying about it and start living it – living it to the point of tears. A good start at living that way it to recall the words of the Psalmist – “This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” – Psalm 118:24

If we wake up each morning and acknowledge and give thanks to God for giving us another day it is bound to be a better day – a day in which we can live life to the point of tears.

Now you know the secret. Say your prayer to thank God for this day and then go out and live your life to the point of tears. It’s going to be a great day!


Seize the moments in your life…

November 29, 2019

A recent post to the Jack’s Winning Words blog featured this quote from Dr. Seuss – “Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.”  (Dr. Seuss)

When I saw that quote, another saying  that I recalled came to mind – “Don’t wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.”  (Zoey Sayward)

Memories are things that we recall from the past, sometimes pleasantly so and so times not. Moments are here and now and what they become is often up to us. Seize the moments in your life.

Some moments just happen and we just happen to be in them. In those cases, we may be pleasantly or unpleasantly surprised and we will later process them into happy or unhappy memories. However, much of the time the moments that we are experiencing we do have some level of control over and it the decisions that we make in the moment that dictate how they will be remembered. Seize the moments in your life.

One can take a very passive approach to life and wait for moments to unfold around you and sweep you along with them; or, you can be pro-active and seize the moment and try to make it the best that it can be.  While we can’t totally dictate the outcome of the moments of our lives, we all can influence those outcomes by how we choose to react to the unfolding events of the moment. We can choose to be victims of the moment or we can be warriors, like Sayward’s saying, and fight to make the moments perfect. Seize the moments in your life.

Seizing the moments in your life is not difficult, but it does require a conscious effort and a continuous effort. One begins to seize the moment when one takes this advice –

“Realize deeply that the present moment is all you have.” ( Eckhart Tolle)

-and –

“There are no ordinary moments.”  (Dan Millman)

Moments that feel ordinary to you are just moments that you didn’t take the time to appreciate. You took them and life for granted. If you live each moment as if it were your last, you will begin to understand what Tolle and Millman were saying. Seize the moments in your life.

Sometimes the moments are difficult, but that is OK, because you will benefit from having lived through them. As Deena Kastor said – “Sometimes the moments that challenge us the most, define us.” Any soldier, and especially any Marine, will tell you how going through boot camp helped defined them. Many were further tested and defined by moments on the battlefield. Seize the moments in your life.

Perhaps no better advice about seizing the moments in your life has ever been given than that given by Rcik Warren in this quote –

“Happy moments, PRAISE God. Difficult moments, SEEK God. Quiet moments, WORSHIP God. Painful moments, TRUST God. Every moment, THANK God. “ 

Remember that God is with you every moment and that will help you – Seize the moments in your life.


How are you carrying your loads?

July 10, 2019

A saying attributed to Lou Holtz is this morning’s inspiration –

“It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it.”  (Lou Holtz)

It is easy to think immediately about physical loads and the advice that we may have picked up over time about how to lift and carry things. I’ve been amazed from time to time how a couple of appliance delivery guys, or maybe moving company guys, can use a simple set of straps to lift and carry heavy appliances or other items. They know how to carry those loads by using that strap.

Lou_HoltzI suspect that the load that Holtz was referring to had more to do with the loads of obligations or stress or guilt or remorse or sadness that we all pick up in life over time. For many, the “life” loads that occur are not carried well and they end up breaking down under the load. Some point to the inability to deal with (to carry) these loads as the root cause of depression and suicide.

The key to the ability of the moving guy to lift and carry heavy or bulky boxes or items is that strap that they use to gain leverage and the right grip on the load. It is also important to know when a load should be shared with a partner. In dealing with our life loads, our strap is our faith and the partner that we need is God. The life loads that I mentioned above are very real and can be very heavy – the loss of a abusived wifeloved one, the end to a relationship, the loss of a job come to mind. However, the loads can also include the regret at having made a thoughtless remark about someone or the guilt that comes after passing by the person in need of help.

To extend the moving person analogy a bit further, it is also important eventually to put the load down. Using your faith as the strap that allows you to lift and bear the load. Asking God for help when you need it allows you r bear even heavier loads. But, it is also important to find a way and a place to put the load down. Accepting that the person is woman-prayinggone or that the relationship is over or that the job went away or that you did do what you now regret is a first step. Turning that acceptance into a memory that finds its place in your knowledge bank is the next step. Using that knowledge to go on with life is the final step. Dwelling in a pit of disbelief or remorse or regret is a sure formula for depression. It happened. It’s over. You need to move on. Grab your strap of faith and move that event to its proper place in your memories and then PUT IT DOWN.

Prayer is a good way to pause and think about the loads that you might be carrying and how you are dealing with them. Maybe, in addition to asking for help with today’s decisions, you can ask God to help you find the right place to put down some of the loads that you’ve been carrying around for a while. Maybe it’s time to put down the load of sadness from the loss of a loved one and find that place in your heart where fond memories of them will live forever and bring a smile to your face, rather than a frown.depression 5 Maybe you can refocus all of the energy that you have been putting into regret over the loss of that old job into doing better at your new job. Maybe you can turn the remorse of having made that insensitive remark to a fellow worker into motivation for being a better person towards others.

Now that you’ve figured out how to carry and put down your loads, make better use of the strap of your faith to pick up and share the loads of others who could use your help. Help them lift the loads of poverty or infirmity or loss by being there for them, on the other end of the strap. You may be surprised that your own loads start to feel lighter or gods-hands-2that you just put them down without thinking about it.  That is the hand of God and he is on both ends of the strap that is lifting you up. Let God carry your load; you’ve things to do helping others with their loads. Don’t worry. It won’t break you down. You know how to carry those loads – God is on the other end of your strap.


Living in the Discovery Channel…

April 17, 2019

A recent post to the Jack’s Winning Words blog had this quote – “Life is based on growth and finding new challenges to face and overcome, new contributions to make to society, and constantly coming to a better understanding of yourself and the universe in which you live.” –  Denis Waitley

Life is like binge watching the Discovery Channel, only better, because you get to be in the show. Life is the ultimate reality show. Waitley sums up a lot of things in that quote, most of which boil down to the constant discovery and learning that living a full life entails.

It is probable that none of us ends each day by reflecting on the challenges that we facedinsight and overcame or the things that we discovered about ourselves or about life in general. Yet it is that collection of insights that comprises what wisdom that we have accumulated in our lives. It is our ability to tap into that pool of wisdom that helps us get through life and face new challenges.

One way to turn life’s events into wisdom is to pause at the end of each day to reflect in prayer on how things turned out. Events may still be unfolding or perhaps you just didn’t have time to internalize what occurred during the day. We use phrases like “it didn’t hit me until later” or “I didn’t have time to think.” Pausing to pray can give you that time, as well as time to either thank God for helping you get through woman-prayingthe events or asking His help tomorrow when you must face them again. That pause also allows you evaluate how you are spending your life and may force you to re-evaluate your priorities in life.

I have posted here in the past about saying a little prayer in the morning to ask God for His help in making the right decisions during the day by praying, “Not my will, but thy will be done.” Perhaps the little prayer at the end of the day is a check of how well you were able to implement that morning prayer during the day. If nothing else, maybe it will allow you to accept what happened during the day as God’s will and let go and move on with life.

So, as Waitley might have put it, tune in and turn on to life; experience it and learn from it; seek out new challenges and opportunities to learn; become more aware of yourself man prayingand those around you; be conscious of how you can contribute to society. However, in all of these things, be aware of your relationship to God and His role in our lives. God watches us all…we are His reality play. Don’t write yourself out of the play by forgetting to pray.


Strengthen your bones…

March 20, 2019

A recent post to my favorite source of inspiration, the Jack’s Winning Words blog,  had this quote – “To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.” – Reba McEntire

While not real anatomical parts of our bodies, all three of these “bones” are important to leading a happy life.

Your wishbone is where hopes and dreams come from and everyone needs to aspire to accomplish things. It is in working towards those dreams that we accomplished thingsVR2 and experience successes. Wishes, hopes and dreams may start as rather nebulous ideas, but in the fleshing out of those vague thoughts comes our life plans. We set timetables and establish goals along the way. We figure out different paths to achieve those goals and we deal with the setbacks that may occur and we pursue them. Beyond all of that for this life; through our faith, we hold onto the hope for the better life to come.

Your backbone is the resolve that you muster each day or for the day’s happenstances to preserver and find a way through or out of the situation and continue pursuing your predjuicesgoals. It is also the nerve and bravery that you need to stand on your beliefs and principals in the face of adversity or setbacks. Your backbone holds you up when life tries to beat you down. Sometimes we need to strengthen our backbone, our resolve to go on, and that can be done through prayer, where we ask for strength from God to see us through. Our faith works to strengthen our backbones.

Finally, we all need a sense of humor or a funny bone in our lives. Life can get very serious and it is easy to let it get us down, unless we can find ways to laugh in the face of adversity and fear. I’ve posted here a few times about not taking yourself or life soSnoopy joy seriously. Laughter is a release for your soul from the things that would weight it down. Sometimes seeing the humor in even a bad situation makes the difference between being able to deal with it and letting it overwhelm you. Sometimes you have to force humor back into your life, because things seem so bad. Keep a couple of quick links to YouTube videos your favorite comedy routines. That way you can go watch them and they will probably do the trick to light you up a bit.

Like many other important parts of your overall health, these three aspects work best when they are strengthened through regular exercise. Keep these important bones in your body in good shape by regularly dreaming, hoping and wishing; plus standing up for what you believe is right; and, finally, by laughing regularly at yourself and the things that happen in life. Life will feel a lot better and success will come your way.

 


How will things turn out for you?

March 19, 2019

The Jack’s Winning Words blog today shared this bit of wisdom  “Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out.”  (Art Linkletter) Jack went on to write a little bit about Art Linkletter’s life, which turned out OK for him.

How about you? Are you able to make the best of what comes you way in life or do you rail against history? Different people react differently to the twists and turns that life blowhardthrows at them. Some refuse to accept that something has happened or is happening. Strangely, some confuse belief with facts and many have even bought into the concept of “alternative facts” or the thought that “the truth is not the truth”. These people stand outside on a cold winter day and ask, “What ever happened to global warming? We could use some of that warming right now.”  For those confused people ignorance is temporary bliss; however, in the end, it is still ignorance.

Others let life’s downs overwhelm them and slip into bouts of depression. They are unable to see any way to make the best of what has happened and most have no facing the wall 2foundation of faith upon which to base their reaction to events in their lives. For many it is that inability to see a way OUT of the situation that is the key hang up. They are looking for the wrong thing. What they need to focus upon is a way THRU the events that have happened or which are happening – a way forward in life. That “no way out” mentality leads to suicides as an answer. There is always a better answer.

Those who profess to be “people of faith” turn to God for help getting through the things that life throws their way. Some may initially ask God to change history, to make some incident or pain go away. They know in the back of their minds that this is not the way God works in our lives. Eventually they ask for God’s help in the right way, praying for gods-hands-2the strength to get through the events and the continued faith to believe that things will turn out for the best. God shows them the way through the events and leads them out of the dungeon of depression.

So, how will things turn out for you? Do you fight against history or find a way to make the best of how things have turned out. Do you waste time asking, “Why me, God?’ or “How could you let this happen to me, God?”; or, do you find the strength of faith to say, “Thy will be done” and move on with life? You can’t change history (or the facts), but you can waste a lot of time and energy wallowing in self-pity or refusing to accept what has happened and dealing with it in a way that allows you to move forward. Maybe the best that you can make of the decisionssituation is just to learn from it, so that you don’t make the same mistake again. That’s something. That’s positive. That’s making the best of it.

How will things turn out for you? It all depends upon how you react and what you make of the situation. What’s your choice?


Watch or DIY?

March 12, 2019

I don’t watch a lot of television anymore, but when I do it is likely to be a reality TV show. No, I don’t watch the Kardashians; more likely one of the car shows on the Motor Trend channel or American Pickers on the History Channel. My wife likes the Dr. Pol show and other reality shows on the Animal Planet channel and the National Geographic channel.

Obviously, these shows aren’t pure reality TV, since they are taped and edited and the participants know that they are being taped. I suppose that the live action police body camera TV shows come closest to being reality shows. However, the shows that  I mentioned do provide that mindless respite from our own reality that we all need everywatching TV now and then.

Occasionally, I’ll be watching one of these shows and the thought comes to mind, “Why am I watching what they’re doing instead of doing something myself.” Do you ever feel like that? It’s a guilt reflex triggered by the realization that I’m not “doing something”, combined with the inability to let go and relax. My wife gets on my case about not being able to relax all the time.

Still, there is a message there that living one’s own life is better than watching someone else live his or her life. Doing it yourself (DIY) is better than watching someone else do it. I am often inspired by that thought to get up and turn off the tube and find things to do. There are always things that need doing or that you know you should do. Even reading a good book is better than sitting there watching someone else reading a book (how dumb would that be?).

The next time that you find yourself mindlessly watching Duck Dynasty, The Real dinosaurHousewives of Wherever, or whatever reality you have tuned into, ask yourself if there isn’t something that you could/should be doing that would add more value to your life or the lives of others around you? I suspect that you’ll put down the snack, turn off the TV and start DIY. And that’s a good thing. Living your life to the fullest is a whole lot more exciting than watching the lives of others on TV and you don’t have to wait through commercials to get to the next good part.

Watch or DIY – you make the choice.