Think about and live today…

January 8, 2026

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent Jan. 2, 2012.

“I think in terms of the day’s resolutions, not the year’s.” (Henry Moore) In Glenn McCoy’s cartoon The Duplex, Eno worries about keeping his New Year’s resolutions. Fang, his dog, tells him not to worry, because the day will be over in a few hours. That’s the way it is with resolutions. Keeping them – one day at a time – should be the goal. Make today count. 😉 Jack

Many people spend o much time reliving the past or worrying excessively about the future and not enough time just living today with intention. I have seen the advice that is in today’s post from Jack Freed expressed just a little differently, but with the same intent. The advice was to start each day by expressing an intention for the day – something that you wish to accomplish that day.

Certainly, your intention (resolution) for the day can be a part of a bigger, longer plan or goal, but it is important to be able to bring focus to something that you can accomplish within the day. That allows you to shut out the distraction of worrying about things that must come later and to focus your attention and energy on today.

I find it more difficult to implement this advice now that I am retired and living in a senior living facility. There are no longer any demands being placed upon me by a job; however, I still have duties to attend to as caretaker from my spouse and our dog. So my daily resolution is to do a better, more patient and more understanding job of those duties than I did yesterday. It’s a work in progress.

Do you start each day by taking a moment to focus on what needs to be done that day? Do you consciously make those things your priorities for the day? Are you able to let go of the past and stop thinking (worrying) excessively about the future? If so, good for you. If not, now you know what you need to work on. Think about it. Live it.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration | Tagged: , , , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Pretty is as pretty does…

September 22, 2025

Jack’s Winning Words – Reposts of the blog posts of Pastor Jack Freed. Originally sent September 22, 2015.

“We get so worried about being pretty. Let’s be pretty kind, pretty funny, pretty smart, pretty strong.” (Britt Nicole) The first Beauty Contest in America was after the Civil War, and now there’s conversation about banning such contests, especially of children. Although many seem to recognize that prettiness is more than physical beauty, for some it’s the only beauty. Reread today’s quote. Isn’t it more important to emphasize qualities other than beauty? You don’t need a mirror to see what makes you pretty! 😉  Jack

I think Britt might agree that the prettiest contestant in all of those beauty pageants was probably the one voted Miss Congeniality by her fellow contestants. Those were the contestants who’s beauty showed through in their personalities as much, if not more, than in their superficial physical beauty. Although not “beautiful” in the traditional physical appearance sense, to the poor of Calcutta and those who worked with her, Mother Theresa was one of the most beautiful people that the world has known. All of us can be beautiful people if we try.

Just remember that being pretty is not al about looks, it is also about your actions and how you live your life. Pretty is as pretty does. Try to be a pretty person today.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration | Tagged: , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Live the prayer…

September 3, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent August 27, 2020.

Picture of Jack Freed

“The older I get the less I listen to what people say and the more I look at what they do.” (Andrew Carnegie) Yesterday I heard that a neighbor said of me, “Jack’s been around here since Jesus was an altar boy.” Now, that’s old…old enough to comment that what people do is more important than what they say. Long-ago-Detroit-poet, Edgar Guest wrote: “I’d rather see a sermon than hear one any day.” Let’s learn to respect each other not for our words, but for the honesty of our actions. 😉  Jack

Another old saw is “Do as I say, not as I do”, which our children usually ignore as they emulate and imitate what they see us doing, not what we are telling them to do. As Edgar Guest said, we must live the sermon, not just speak it or listen to it. One may also say, “you must live the prayer”, not just say it.

Almost every night I say a little prayer asking the Lord to help me be a better person tomorrow than I was today. I pray to be more sympathetic and empathetic, more kind and understanding, more patient, less judgmental and more willing to jump in and help someone, rather than stand back or avoiding them. I must repeat the prayer every night because most days I do not get too far into the day before old habits or prejudices once again throw me off my desired course.

So, I look back each evening and try to understand what I did as opposed to what a said I was going to do. I have a lot more praying to do. How about you?

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Where’s that man gone?

July 29, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent August 3, 2018. Reposts from the blog of the late Pastor Jack Freed.

Mark Twain

“Never lie to someone who trusts you and never trust someone who lies to you.” (Mark Twain) I read that 60% of people will lie at least once during a 10-minute conversation – little white lies, mostly. Whatever…truth is taking a beating these days. We used to believe: “A man’s as good as his word.” Where’s that man gone? If we’re to have a culture of believability, it has to start with us. Lying, as a norm, is unacceptable. We can do better than that. 😉  Jack

 We have lots of new terms to cover lying, especially in the current political environment – misinformation…disinformation…fake news…and more. Twain would have simplified them all as lies. Although often attributed to Arthur Schopenhauer, Twain is also credited with saying, “All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.” We have certainly witnessed a lot of the ridicule and violent opposition stages in recent years.

I think the key takeaway from Jack’s post is that if we want the culture to change it has to start with us. We can and should be doing better in our own day-to-day loves by embracing and living in an honest and ruthful way. We must be honest not only with others but with ourselves, too. There are no “little white lies”, there are just lies, especially when we are lying to ourselves.

The lies that we tell ourselves are especially insidious because they encourage us to lie to others about things such as how we feel or what we believe. Many times, the lies that we tell ourselves are really just excuses – excuses for failures, excuses for things that we have done and for things that we have left undone.

In the prayers of confession that start our church service each week we pray for forgiveness for things that we ‘ve done and things that we’ve left undone. Perhaps we also need t forgive ourselves in order to move on with life. I wrote about forgiving yourself back in 2022 – see https://normsmilfordblog.com/2022/10/08/forgive-yourselffree-yourselfmove-on/

So, stop lying to yourself and to others. Forgive yourself for things that are in your past and move on. You will have no need for lies. The creation of a culture of believability starts with you. Jack asked where has that man gone? Answer by saying, “He is here, I am him”. We can do netter than that and it starts with us.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Imagine a different future…

July 14, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words 7/14/25 – Reposts from the blog of the late Pastor Jack Freed – Originally sent March 2, 2021.

Picture of Jack Freed

“Laugh when you can; apologize when you should; and let go of what you can’t change.” (Posted by Carrie Goldring) Carrie is a friend of mine and writes regularly about how to cope after divorce. Divorce can be a roller coaster ride, creating stress, anxiety, and fear. Relaxed exercise helps keep a mind ready for making decisions. While it’s certainly hard to abandon a dream, sometimes the moment arrives to imagine a different future. 😉 Jack

 I always get inspiration from Jack’s posts and today’s repost is a great example of why. Jack’s posts almost always related something about how the saying for that day can be used in our daily lives. He also almost always threw the ball back into the reader’s court to figure out how it related to their life.  Imagine a different future.

I’ve posted here quite often about letting go of the past and moving on, but I like the way that jack put it – “sometimes the moment arrives to imagine a different future.” Many of us spend too much time lamenting things from the past or imagining all of the things that could go wrong with something in the future. Imagine a different future.

If you would like to read my advice for letting go of things, please refer to:

https://normsmilfordblog.com/2022/08/03/dump-your-ego-and-find-peace/ or maybe https://normsmilfordblog.com/2020/08/12/let-it-go-spit-it-out-taste-the-joy/

In sports this is called visualization. Professional athletes, especially pro golfers spend some time before each shot visualizing (imagining) how the shot will go – the trajectory, the landing and the backspin. They “see” the shot before it happens and then they try to execute the shot as they have imagined it. Imagine a different future.

Many motivational speakers will tell you that you can do the same thing in your daily life. Whether it is attending a meeting or making a sales call or just how you will react or act when encountering someone else socially or on a date; you can imagine that event and see it as you would like it to occur. This “preloads” the desired outcome into your mind and prepares you to keep things moving in the desired direction by making good decisions that support your desired outcome, in case there are any glitches.  Imagine a different future.

Perhaps we can best sum up what Jack found helpful in Carries quote by adding Jack’s thought to it to make it read – Laugh when you can; apologize when you should; let go of what you can’t change; and imagine a different future. When you do that, if you can do that, your life will change for the better. Life can be what you imagine it to be if you let it. Imagine a different future.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration, Pure fun | Tagged: , , , , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Start all over again…

July 7, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent July 12, 2013. Reposts of the advice posts from the blog of the late Pastor Jack Freed.

“There are two disappointments in life. One is not getting what you want. The other is getting it.” (Oscar Wilde) Disappointments? We all have them. A job loss, a broken relationship, a health issue… I like the advice in this old song, “When my chin is on the ground, I pick myself up, dust myself off, and start all over again.” Life is a series of learning experiences, and there comes a time when we just have to move on. 😉 Jack

 It is interesting that Jack, like most of us I suspect, focused upon the disappointment of not getting what we want, not achieving a goal or winning at a pursuit. But, what about the disappointment of actually winning, of achieving what we have been striving for? How can that be disappointing? Start all over again…

After the initial feeling of euphoria or accomplishment following the achievement of a goal or getting wat we’ve been striving for so long, there comes the letdown (disappointment) of no longer having that goal to motivate us. Many athletes experience this once that have achieved their goals as competitors. What do you do after you’ve become the best in the world at your event or become the star of a professional team in your sport?  Start all over again…

It may be hard for us to imagine, but the accumulation of yet another million dollars to a person like Elon Musk, or Warren Buffet or Bill Gates brings very little satisfaction, if any. Star athletes also have a hard time sometimes moving on after achieving the athletic levels that they trained for all their lives. We are fascinated by how people react to having achieved the goals that were driving them. Start all over again…

We occasionally see the sad stories of people whom we thought “had it all and threw it away”. Some turned to alcohol or drugs when they no longer had the motivation of striving towards their goal. We have also witnessed people like Bill Gates refocusing their lives on bigger, more altruistic goals of philanthropy, like ending world hunger or maybe eradicating a terrible disease. Start all over again…

How we react to winning and achieving our goals in life is as important (if not more so) than how we react to failures. As with failure, in success we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and start all over again. We must move on to establish new goals. Start all over again…

I think that refocusing from achieving specific and tangible goals, such as having so many dollars in the bank or achieving a specific record in some event onto the less tangible goal of just being happy is a great start. That might involve being happier with what you already have than being unhappy about things that you don’t have. Start all over again…

If you become more focused upon and cognizant of things that make you happy you will soon see that money, possessions and power over others has little to do with your own happiness. I think that you will realize that you are happiest when you have helped to bring happiness to others, when you have made a positive difference in someone else’s life. Start all over again…

Maybe you should start each day with a little prayer, not asking for more things for yourself, but by being thankful for what you already have and by asking God for the ability and opportunities to help others. At the end of the day, if you can look back and see the times when you helped someone, it was a good day and I’ll bet that you are happy about it. Start all over again…

The good news is that you may get another chance tomorrow to start all over again.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Try empathy first…

July 3, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Reposts from the blog of the late pastor Jack Freed. Originally sent July 1, 2015

“Be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, and tolerant of the weak, because someday in your life you will be all of these.” (G.W. Carver) Often I can go into a gathering of people and know that I have once been the age of each person. Empathy is the ability to feel as others feel. People would be better able to understand poverty, ageism, homelessness and racism if they had experienced it. If you can’t be empathetic, try to be sympathetic. 😉  Jack 

When I Googled sympathy, I got the following response that was generated by the Google’s AI bot – Sympathy and empathy are both emotional responses to another person’s situation, but they differ in the depth of the emotional connection. Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone’s misfortune, while empathy involves understanding and sharing their feelings. In essence, sympathy is “feeling for” someone, whereas empathy is “feeling with” them. 

Empathy is the harder of the two, since it requires you to have had the same experience or to imagine what the other person is feeling in this situation. You may wonder what the other person is feeling and experiencing, but you will likely not be able to “put yourself in their shoes”. There are a few emotions that most people experience, like the sadness at the loss of a loved one; so, if the moment at hand is one of those, then you may be able to empathize. More likely, in most encounters moving on to sympathy is the best choice.

The line, ” I know how you feel” is best left unsaid in any case, even if you have experienced something similar in your life. You really don’t know how they feel. That s especially true when you are dealing with cases of discrimination. No matter if it is racial discrimination or discrimination based upon religion, sexual orientation or any number of other examples. If you are not a member of the same class of people who are being discriminated against, you have no real basis for empathy and need to focus upon sympathy.

Expressing sympathy almost always involves offering help in some way. It’s the “is there anything that I can do for you” response. Finding something that you can “do” for the person with whom you are sympathizing helps both them and you. For both of you it involves breaking out of the emotional state that you were trapped in and refocusing upon the present and upon things that are needed to go on in life, things that need to be done.

So, try empathy first, but move on to sympathy and find a way to help. That will help both that other person and you move on with life. Sometimes you may just need to let that person cry on your shoulder for a while. When the crying stops, give them a hug and ask what you can do to help them right now. That may sound a little cold and calculating, but it is one of the best ways to help the person with whom you are sympathetic.

I have purposely left out any mention of prayer because that is something that should not be forced into your response. If you know the person well enough to know whether they have a strong faith that can be tapped into, prayer can be very powerful tool to help. It may help you if you quietly ask God for his help in your own response of sympathy. Perhaps praying aloud for God to bring his comfort and peace to the person that you are trying to help would help reset their frame of mind. Maybe that’s how you can help.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration | Tagged: , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

The skill of being kind…

June 23, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent Sept 17, 2018. Reposts from the blog of the late Pastor Jack Freed.

“If you have to choose between being kind and being right, choose being kind, and you will always be right.” (Sent by Tara Kane) My friend Tara teaches more than public safety to college students. She explains to them (as illustrated in her quote) the importance of knowing how to get along with people. Whether it be a police officer, a fire fighter, or an ordinary citizen, knowing how to be kind to others is an important skill. Keep your eyes open today to “see” kindness….and let others see yours. 😉  Jack

 It is interesting to read that Jack called being kind an important skill that one needs to develop. Being kind is not an emotion caused by something (someone) or even a reaction to something happening. You don’t get kind, like you might get happy or sad and you don’t become kind like you might become afraid. Kindness is an action word; you have to be kind. It requires you to act (or react) in a certain way. Being kind requires a conscious effort or response on your part. That means you have to think about it, whether you realize it or not. Develop the skill of kindness.

I think being kind is based upon making the conscious decision that you wish to be kind in all that you do. That may not be obvious to you, but there are certainly people that you will encounter who have not made that decision. They are sometimes thought of as being cruel. I may call them jerks (sorry, that wasn’t very kind), but I’m sure you have your own name for them. These are the people who cut you off in traffic, who make negative remarks about people or who may call others who are in need losers. They are not being kind. Develop the skill of kindness.

So, how does one develop the skill of being kind? It starts by being more aware of the fact that you are reacting to and making decisions about how to act on everything that is happening to you and around you. You must develop the ability to stop and think, if only for a moment, before you act or react. You must ask yourself the question, what is the right thing, the kind thing to do in this situation? Just that split-second pause will allow you to regain some control over what might have been a knee-jerk reaction. In the next split-second your brain will be able to evaluate the situation and decide between the right and wrong response – the kind response. Develop the skill of kindness.

If you have made the conscious decision to be kind, the actual decision to do so will be easier in any situation, and you will do the right thing. Sometimes that is just catching yourself before you do the wrong thing, making matters worse. Sometimes being kind means doing nothing at all. Even then, being kind means doing so with a smile or a friendly gesture. Putting that smile on your face will make you feel better and may even make others feel better, too. Perhaps adding a line to your daily prayers – Lord help me to be a kinder person today than I was yesterday – would help reinforce kindness for you. Develop the skill of kindness.

Jack advised us to keep our eyes open for acts of kindness by others and let others see your kindness. You can learn new ways to be kind by observing others. Others will see your acts of kindness once you stop just having  kind thoughts and start doing kind deeds. Work on being more cognizant of the opportunities to be kind that you may encounter during the day and then act with kindness on those opportunities. Develop the skill of kindness.

Have a great and kindness filled day… Develop the skill of kindness.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , , , , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Where will you find inspiration?

June 21, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally posted 1/15/21- Reprints of posts to his blog by the late Pastor Jack Freed

“You can look anywhere and find inspiration.”  (Frank Gehry)  Vanity Fair named Gehry the most important architect of our time.  His quote today became a challenge for me to look around…  What can give me inspiration?.  My hand?  Max Lucado’s book, Wonderful?  How about the waste basket?  I decided on the keyboard’s delete key.  What if there were a delete key for life mistakes?  When it comes to our “sins” God has a delete key on His laptop, too.  😉  Jack

As you have probably noticed if you have read this blog for any time, I used to find much of my inspiration for posts to this blog by reading the daily blog posts that I got from the late Pastor Jack Freed. I would usually expand on the topic from the 2-3 sentences that Jack used in his posts. When Jack passed, I was at a loss for inspiration for a while and my posts to my own blog waned. Then his son started reposting some of his best posts and I again found inspiration in those reposts. I also remembered that I had saved most of the emails that Jack sent with his daily posts in them, like the post above. Where will you find inspiration?

I like Jack’s analogy about the keyboard’s Delete key. Many apps also have an “Undo” feature that backs things up in the workflow to a point before the present and lets you try again. That would certainly be helpful in life, wouldn’t it? However, life doesn’t give us “do overs”. Instead, the best that we can do is to let go of the past and move on.  Sometimes what we need is a little inspiration to get us started again. Where will you find inspiration?

Inspiration doesn’t have to be writing blog posts. You may be inspired to do some work around the house or maybe to do some volunteer work. It could be that you are inspired to go visit somebody or maybe call them. It doesn’t matter what it is; inspiration is that little push that you need to get you started towards some goal. Where will you find inspiration?

Ideas, dreams or desires often turn into inspiration once you get past the inertia of doing nothing about them. Guilt about something that you did or remorse about something that you didn’t do can also inspirate some action to correct things. Many laws have been passed and charity foundations created out of work that was inspired by a loss or tragedy. Some find inspiration in prayer. I like the little prayer I saw recently – “Lord help me to be a better person today than I was yesterday.” Everyone should be inspired by that. Where will you find inspiration?

Look for it and you will find it. Where will you find inspiration?

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Focus on the goodness…

June 16, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent June 16, 2009.

“Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.” (Regina Brett) Brett’s quote is a reminder that expecting perfect equity often leads to frustration. But when we separate the idea of “fairness” from “goodness”, we recognize that even when we’re dealt an unfair hand, there are still positive experiences, growth and beauty in this world. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t fight for justice, but we can’t let it block out the goodness in life. Have a good day! 😉 Jack

Life seems to have lots of loud things, often bad things, that vie for our attention and quite often drown out the good things. Bad things can be like flash-bang grenades. They go off in our faces, command our attention and sometimes they blind us to the good that is still there. They are the “Hey, hey look at me” things that distract us and which can consume us if we let them. People who experience depression get stuck focusing upon the bad things and can’t see a way out. It’s like being in a long dark tunnel. Yet there is always a little light at the end of the tunnel. That light is Hope. Focus on the goodness.

I wrote about the light of hope for depression back in 2022 – see https://normsmilfordblog.com/2022/01/05/hope-supplies-the-light/ so I won’t repeat myself here. This post is not about depression; it is about focusing upon the goodness of life in your everyday life. That is a great way to balance out all the bad noise that can seem to be all around. Focus on the goodness.

The good news is that the goodness of life is all around us, too. Goodness is usually not as loud and there are few bringing it to our attention. A few of the broadcast news shows now have a segment at the end that takes the time to highlight stories of goodness. These are usually stories of people helping other people or maybe about people overcoming great difficulties and ending up happy. They are feel good stories that are intended to do just that for the viewers – make them feel good. Focus on the goodness.

When you aren’t watching the news you can find the goodness that is around you by looking for it. It may be as simple as observing the goodness of the innocent play, laughter, and happiness of children. Perhaps you will recognize the goodness of someone opening a door for you or feel good when you hold a door open for someone else. Maybe something good will happen to you unexpectedly or perhaps after something bad has happened you stop to realize that you are OK…and that all is good. Focus on the goodness.

The key to seeing and appreciating the goodness around you is your frame of mind. A good way to start is to stop right after you wake up each day and say a little prayer thanking God for another day. At the end of that prayer, ask God to help you focus on the good in life rather than the bad things. Those bad things will still be there, but you won’t be focusing upon them. Try it. You’ll like it. You’ll be surprised how different life looks to you and how much better you feel about life when you stay focused upon the goodness around you.  Focus on the goodness.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , , , , , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

« Previous Entries