As a Realtor, I’ve written more than once about the 3-P’s that a seller must keep in mind when listing their house – Price, Persistence and Patience. I help with setting the price, but the last two are really up to them. They must be persistent in getting the house ready to show before they leave for work each day and they must be patient with the process, especially if their home is in the price bands above $300,000 that are particularly slow right now.
Recently the pastor at my church preached on the topic of the 3-P’s of prayer, which he named as Pattern, Persistence and Payoff.
I assumed at the beginning of the sermon that the Pattern part of the 3-P’s was about getting into a routine (a pattern) of praying; however, the pastor explained that Pattern is about the structure of the prayer and pointed to the lesson that Jesus taught the Disciples when they 
asked him how they should pray. He gave them a pattern that we now call the Lord’s Prayer. In Matthew 6:9–13 (ESV), Jesus said “Pray then like this: ‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.'”
Jesus established a Pattern with that prayer that is useful for all prayers. The first part acknowledges who you are praying too and pays God the homage that He is due. It also acknowledges that it is His will that will be done and not your own. It also reminds us of our responsibility to forgive others and clear our hearts of hate or prejudices or grudges. Then you can make your request. That simple pattern accomplishes everything that you need when praying.
The second part of the pastor’s message was Persistence – the fact is that you must pray more than once and pray as often as you can for the things that you need and want God to
help you with. Too often in our modern, “instant gratification” world we have expectations of immediate action from God to grant our prayers. God doesn’t work like that. The pastor didn’t make this point, but I started to think that perhaps it takes longer than we might wish because we have yet to uphold our end of the bargain that is stated in the Lord’s Prayer – we have not forgiven our debtors ( or those who trespass (or sin) against us in different versions of the prayer). Perhaps God is waiting for us to get our act together a bit better before he grants our prayer. Have we forgiven those who trespassed against us in some way? If we do not have forgiveness in our hearts, perhaps we should pray for that first.
That last part was a part of the message that the pastor delivered about the last “P” in the 3-P’s of prayer – the Payoff. Now this part of the message wasn’t about praying to win the lottery and having God dump the winning ticket in your hands. That’s not how it works and, in fact, God may be answering your prayers in ways that you just don’t understand. 
Perhaps you are praying for God to somehow help you get something in particular because you think that will make you happy – maybe it’s a job, money, or a new possession of some sort or perhaps a date with a specific person. Maybe instead God is answering your prayer to be more happy by showing you ways to be happy with what you have and who you are. Is God answering your prayers? In His own way; yes, He is. You just don’t yet understand. If we believe that God acts in our best interests, then we must also accept his answer to our prayers, even if we don’t understand the answers.
There have been many little things in my life that I have said a little prayer for and then may have forgotten about; yet when I look back at how things turned out, I have to thank God for the answers that he worked out for me. Oft times his answer was not to give me
what I had asked for and I look back later and I realize that not getting that thing worked out better for me. God took me in a different direction and I have to thank Him for that. The “His will be done” part worked out better for me. Often, the hard part is letting go of the idea that I can solve problems by myself and letting Him work his will in my life.
I liked what the pastor had to say in his sermon; however, I might combine his 3-P’s with mine from real estate and say that a good guide for life might be these three P’s – Prayer, Persistence and Patience. If you can live by those three P’s you’ll achieve the forth P – the payoff – a peace that passes all understanding.
Have a great week ahead and say a little prayer before you start each day. Remember the 3-P’s of prayer – Pattern, Persistence and Payoff.
Posted by Norm Werner 
As a society we have become too fixated on score keeping, on winning and losing, on a zero sum game philosophy of life that somehow relates winning for one person meaning that someone else must lose. One of our presidential candidates seems to take great pleasure in characterizing people with whom he disagrees on various topics as “losers”.
endured years and years of what most would see as a loss, suffering in prison for his anti-apartheid activities. Yet Mandela did not let his imprisonment conquer is will and his soul. At the end of each day of imprisonment Mandela could claim another day of winning – a victory of his soul and spirit over those who sought to break him.
might have wanted to do in order to help someone who perhaps struggles to do anything at all? I think so. Is it a win to spend time with a shut-in who otherwise might just sit and stare out the window at traffic going by? I think so. Is it a win to take the money that you otherwise might have spent on another pair of shoes or another outfit and donate it instead to help those without any shoes and standing naked or in tatters? I think so. What do you really lose in those situations, when compared to how much you gain (win) in your soul?
we give up the pursuit of perfection (sort of like Mercedes with their cars).
that you were striving for or get turned down that date that you finally worked up the courage to ask for or perhaps suffered through yet another snub or social rejection. You’re not perfect. Life isn’t perfect. Accept the temporary setback, analyze what you did or didn’t do correctly to achieve that goal and try to learn from it. More important yet, think about how this incident in your life has helped you grow as a person.
clearly and putting life into better perspective.
them.” (John Green) That’s certainly true in today’s air conditioned houses where people come and go through their garage and are never seen on the front porch or out in the yard. I’ve even had clients who had to get new front door locks because they never use that door and had no idea where the keys were any more.
mat that he saw somewhere that reads: “As far as anyone knows, we’re a nice happy family.”
that the deception was “for the kids.” Most of the time, the kids (especially the older children) can sense that something wasn’t right between mommy and daddy.
they hold it in; however that eventually leads them to becoming moody or angry or fearful and feeling lonely. They don’t seek outside help and they turn away from the very support structure that is right there under roof with them. As they withdraw the relationship often turns sour due to confusion or a sense of loss of interest on the part of their significant other and eventually that isolation leads to a breakup of the marriage. Sadly I saw that a lot in the recent Great Recession as men reacted badly to job losses or even to the loss of their spouse’s job.
The other thing that I have seen more of than I can understand are couples who have finally called an abusive or manipulative relationship quits. While that is normally an action taken by the women involved, I have seen the opposite when a weak man finally has had enough from an overly strong and domineering wife. I have also seen it in the GLBT community. I’ve never really understood why someone would commit to be in an abusive relationship to begin with; however, people that I’ve talked to about that said that it didn’t start that way or that the abusive partner changed after they entered the relationship.
families often go to great lengths to keep the deception of a normal home alive for the external world. In some cases the family may seek help for the substance abuser, but in other cases the old saw “We don’t talk about that” seems to hold sway. All too often the substance abuser eventually turns into just an abuser, due to the huge mood swings and stresses that accompany the habit. Eventually these unions also break up and I’m called in to sell the family home.
minimum you need to be able to have open and honest discussions about the things that aren’t going as you would like and how you both are reacting to those things. I really don’t want to meet you and be asked to sell your house because of your divorce. I much rather that you call me because your moving to accommodate a new beginning in a new job or getting ready to expand your family. Maybe you can get back to being that happy family that was mentioned on the welcome mat that everyone thought you were all along.
that, whether it be clean water or electricity for their home or the many other things that people believe are somehow “owed” to them. Somehow the things that we should be thankful for have become expected, even proclaimed as rights. Even the rights that we have that were enshrined in our Constitution were extended to us by the consensus of the people at the time they were written and were not somehow innate.
whether to be happy with what we have now, even while perhaps striving for more or newer or bigger or better somehow. I have learned from experience that the attainment of most of those strivings brought much less satisfaction or joy than I initially imagined it would. It’s just another thing or a bigger thing; but still just a thing.
The other big choice in my life that really worked out was choosing to allow Jesus into my life. Sure, I went through the period of doubt or disbelief that most people do in their youth. I went through the “Going through the motions” period, too; where going to church was more of a social event or just another task to get through at the end of the week.
moment I reached out in desperation and Jesus was there to reach back to me, take my hand and lead me out of that pit. I have found comfort ever since in the little prayer that I said that night – “Not my will, but thy will be done.”
The key to understanding those pieces of advice is our ability to distinguish between those things that we can change from those over which we have no control. Frustration, anger or maybe even despair come from railing against those things that we cannot control, rather than just accepting them and getting on with life.
have to passively accept that. Sometimes, “what it is” might involve a slight or a snub or some other hateful or hurtful behavior towards you and what you still control in those situations is how you react to them. Fortunately, we have some help with that which is captured nicely in this little quote that is also from the Jack’s Winning Words blob –
distinguish in your life those things that you just need to accept from those that you have the power to change and then pray for the courage to change them. Remember that “it isn’t what it is until you decide that it is.”
lately, because opposing views have hardened and compromise has taken on an undesirable meaning that is associated more with losing than with everybody finding a win out of the situation. Our political process, especially at the national level has effectively broken down because of the inability of the parties to compromise and the increasing polarization of those we elected to govern. They cannot govern because they cannot compromise. To them politics and the decisions that they control is a win-lose game.
anxious fears that sometimes drive us to stand back or shy away rather than even try to understand someone else’s point of view. It is our own insecurities that make us cling to old, outdated or bigoted stereotypes, rather than to take the chance of embracing someone new. Perhaps you can meet them half way.
their vantage point and that may drive different decisions or behaviors. Maybe you’ll even have an “aha” moment in which you finally understand their perspective. You don’t have to embrace it, just accept that it exists. You don’t have to go all the way there; you can usually see it, if you’ll just meet them half way.
best listener that I’ve ever met.
inner child-like being that was once so blissfully happy playing with its own toes you may come to realize that everything that you have stripped away to get back to that state is basically meaningless. You can be at peace with yourself. Once you get to that state of having a peaceful heart, the rest of today’s quote takes over and you can begin to really enjoy life’s simple pleasures.
So, to be complete, today’s post headline should say, “Don’t sleep on the problem, sleep on the solution.”
pray about it. When you pray about a problem you aren’t really asking God to make the problem go away, but rather to give you the strength, courage and wisdom to deal with the issues that constitute the problem. You are also asking God to be with you through the problem resolution. Sleep will come easier when you drift off knowing that you can now say “We’ve got this” instead of feeling alone in the thought that “I’ve got this.” After all, what problem stands a chance when you have God in your corner?
on your side. Maybe that will make jotting down three things that you are going to do tomorrow a lot easier.
show that you cared enough to take the time to pray for those in need and for solutions to the big, seemingly impossible problems that plague the world, such as hunger or diseases or discrimination. After all, where are you going to take those big problems and find someone who has a proven track record of doing the impossible and performing miracles? People of faith know that somewhere, somehow, someone will benefit from those prayers. You may not see the results, but you know that there are always results when you ask God for help.
So, if you care, do something about it. Maybe you can take some direct action, maybe not; but, you can always pray. Maybe Mead’s little quote should be slightly changed to read – “Never believe that a few praying people can’t change the world. For, indeed, that’s all who ever have.”
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