Start all over again…

July 7, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent July 12, 2013. Reposts of the advice posts from the blog of the late Pastor Jack Freed.

“There are two disappointments in life. One is not getting what you want. The other is getting it.” (Oscar Wilde) Disappointments? We all have them. A job loss, a broken relationship, a health issue… I like the advice in this old song, “When my chin is on the ground, I pick myself up, dust myself off, and start all over again.” Life is a series of learning experiences, and there comes a time when we just have to move on. 😉 Jack

 It is interesting that Jack, like most of us I suspect, focused upon the disappointment of not getting what we want, not achieving a goal or winning at a pursuit. But, what about the disappointment of actually winning, of achieving what we have been striving for? How can that be disappointing? Start all over again…

After the initial feeling of euphoria or accomplishment following the achievement of a goal or getting wat we’ve been striving for so long, there comes the letdown (disappointment) of no longer having that goal to motivate us. Many athletes experience this once that have achieved their goals as competitors. What do you do after you’ve become the best in the world at your event or become the star of a professional team in your sport?  Start all over again…

It may be hard for us to imagine, but the accumulation of yet another million dollars to a person like Elon Musk, or Warren Buffet or Bill Gates brings very little satisfaction, if any. Star athletes also have a hard time sometimes moving on after achieving the athletic levels that they trained for all their lives. We are fascinated by how people react to having achieved the goals that were driving them. Start all over again…

We occasionally see the sad stories of people whom we thought “had it all and threw it away”. Some turned to alcohol or drugs when they no longer had the motivation of striving towards their goal. We have also witnessed people like Bill Gates refocusing their lives on bigger, more altruistic goals of philanthropy, like ending world hunger or maybe eradicating a terrible disease. Start all over again…

How we react to winning and achieving our goals in life is as important (if not more so) than how we react to failures. As with failure, in success we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and start all over again. We must move on to establish new goals. Start all over again…

I think that refocusing from achieving specific and tangible goals, such as having so many dollars in the bank or achieving a specific record in some event onto the less tangible goal of just being happy is a great start. That might involve being happier with what you already have than being unhappy about things that you don’t have. Start all over again…

If you become more focused upon and cognizant of things that make you happy you will soon see that money, possessions and power over others has little to do with your own happiness. I think that you will realize that you are happiest when you have helped to bring happiness to others, when you have made a positive difference in someone else’s life. Start all over again…

Maybe you should start each day with a little prayer, not asking for more things for yourself, but by being thankful for what you already have and by asking God for the ability and opportunities to help others. At the end of the day, if you can look back and see the times when you helped someone, it was a good day and I’ll bet that you are happy about it. Start all over again…

The good news is that you may get another chance tomorrow to start all over again.

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Posted by Norm Werner

Do it now…

May 19, 2025

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words – Originally sent May 19, 2014.

“While we are postponing, life speeds by.” (Seneca) The problem of procrastination is not new. Seneca wrote about it 2000 years ago. Things need doing NOW; you’re not going to live forever. Many of us are motivated by “dead-lines.” A doctor said, “I can help you, but none of us is going to live forever…not me, not you.” Are there things that need to be done, relationships that need fixing? Life is speeding by. 😉  Jack

It is easy for procrastination to become a way of life. One can get used to not making decisions and living with the consequences. I’ll bet you know someone like that, or maybe you are that someone and you know it. Is life speeding by you?

Fixin’ to. I have developed a habit of procrastination that I call “Fixin’ to”. When faced with a big or complex job, I often tell my wife (and myself) that I’m “fixin’ to get to it”. I tell her (and myself) that I need a little more time for planning and thinking about it, before I get started. In reality, during that “fixin’ to” time, I often let my imagination run wild exploring all of the things that could go wrong. Of course, that further delays the actual work.

As I’ve often opined here, the same mind that can conjure up all of the disasters that might befall you can also deal with problems that do come up by inventing solutions on the fly. So, rather than spend your time “fixin to”, it is better to just do it and focus on the work and problem solutions that are needed.

If you have that feeling that life is just speeding by, maybe it is because you are spending to much “fixin to” time and not enough doing it time. Albert Einstein postulated that time is relative and that if you went fast enough it will even go in reverse. Perhaps if you just jump in and match the pace of life by not procrastinating you will find that it is not speeding you by. You’ll find more joy in life if you keep up with the pace of life.

Just do it now. The past is not worth reliving and the future is something that you really can’t change, no matter how much you worry about it. Live in the moment. Experience life. Solve problems as you go. Enjoy life. Do it now!

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Posted by Norm Werner

Are you stronger than your excuses?

May 7, 2025

I saw this little Zen saying on one of the word games that I play on my phone – “I am stronger than my excuses.”

That little saying resonated with me because I realized that often I am not stronger than the excuses that I come up with and that results in procrastination or paralysis. You can substitute “imagined negative outcomes” for excuses, if that makes more sense to you.

Humans are blessed with great intellectual abilities (as compared to other species) and imagination, out of which comes great ideas and inventions. But, with that ability to think and imagine also comes the liability of imagining all of the possible negative outcomes of any situation – those become the excuses for doing nothing.

One of the traits that often define some of the greatest thinkers and inventors in history is the willingness to try and fail at something and then try again and again. Thomas Edison once said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Imagine how many great inventions we would not have had if Edison had let the fear of failure stop him from trying. He was stronger than his excuses.

It is in substituting the word “fears” for the word “excuses” that the saying reaches its full potential. Excuses are just rationalizations for our inability to overcome our fears. Those fears cause us to stop and maybe never venture a step further. We may even have some understanding that as George Addair said, “Everything you’ve ever wanted is sitting on the other side of fear.” Yet, many just make excuses for not moving forward and trying to get to that “other side”.

Are you stronger than your fears (excuses)? What fears have you let stop you? Are you really happy with the excuses that you’ve created? What can you do about that?

Perhaps a start to overcoming the fear that paralyzes you is found in this quote – “Fear is only as powerful as the attention you give it.” ― Glody Kikonga

Think about the news stories that you see from time to time about someone rescuing an injured driver from a burning car. Often when they are interviewed later someone will ask the hero of the story, “Weren’t you afraid of getting burned or of the car exploding?” Often the answer will be something like, “I didn’t think about it, I just saw the need and acted.” The hero didn’t stop to give those fears any attention. Action overcomes fear by pushing it aside and focusing your mind upon the tasks at hand.

man jumping off cliff

So, maybe the key to being stronger than your excuses (fears) is to jump into action, rather than sitting there thinking about all of the ways that you could fail. Once you are in motion, taking actions, you will find that your amazing mind refocuses upon problem solving, rather than excuse creation. You may initially fail, but you will learn from that failure and setting out on another try will be that much easier.

Allow yourself to try and fail and try again. You are stronger than your excuses, so let yourself do whatever it is that you have been making excuses for not doing.

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Posted by Norm Werner

Have no regrets…

April 2, 2025


“Minimize regret by making decisions based on who you are, not who you wish you were.” (Unknown)
I recently saw that saying somewhere on-line (I can’t remember where). I Googled it and it turned out to closely match the sayings of a life coach who teaches people how to make decisions with minimal regrets. Who knew such people exist?


The other thing that comes up when you Google that phrase are stories about how Jeff Bezos made his decision to leave the Wall Street world and start Amazon. Out of his experiences has come a concept called the Regret Framework, a methodology for making decisions with minimal regret potential. I had no idea that a whole framework existed for avoiding regrets.


While interesting in the context of decision making, I think the basic concept of accepting and understanding who you are and using that understanding as the foundation for living your life is the key. I have posted here before about accepting and loving yourself (see Love Yourself First, and Forgive Yourself). Those are ways that you acknowledge and accept who you are. When you do that, you let go of the burden that comes with trying to be like someone else and can focus on just being the best you that you can be. You will have no regrets.


Our measurement-oriented society does not make living without regrets easy. From a very young age we are encouraged (indeed required) to measure ourselves against others. It is not just about how you did; it is about how did you do against Billy or Sally? Everything becomes a contest where there are declared winners and losers. Regrets are associated with being the loser in whatever it is. Those are most often self-inflicted regrets. Stop measuring yourself against others. You will have no regrets.


One of the organizations that has rejected that scenario is the Special Olympics, where every participant in an event is considered to be a winner for having tried their best. Everyone gets a medal and no one has to have regrets. Be the best participant in life that you can be. You will have no regrets.


If you accept and learn to love who you are you will have no need to measure yourself against others. You will stop trying to meet expectations based upon someone that you wished you could be. You allow yourself to be happy with what you were able to accomplish. You will have no regrets.


Forgiving yourself and accepting yourself are both solitary experiences and one might think that you will feel lonely in such experiences. I posted about that to in Don’t be lonely…love yourself. You will have no regrets.


If you find that you need a framework for your life so that you don’t end up with regrets, look to your faith. There are tons of examples and guidance for a regret free life to be found in the Bible. No better example for living a regret-free life exists than Jesus. Jesus does not ask that you measure yourself against him. Rather he sets the example of what to strive for, His life provides goals for us to use for our lives. Keep those goals in mind and You will have no regrets.

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Posted by Norm Werner

Find God and find yourself…

October 13, 2017

A recent post to the Jack’s Winning words blog posed this question – “If I am what I have, and I lose what I have, who then am I?”  (Eric Fromm)

If you’ve watched the news lately there have been many examples of people losing everything, whether it was to hurricanes in the Caribbean or earthquakes in Mexico orfire burning home fires in California. There were scenes on the nightly news of people returning to their homes only to find that they no longer existed. More than one was heard saying, “I’ve lost everything.” Many were also heard thanking God that they had been spared their lives.

Some people seem to base their identities largely on what they have accumulated in life – their possessions. Others, especially men, express their identities through their jobs and what they have achieved at work. In either case, life can throw curves at us that take away either or both. Most people eventually gather themselves up and realize that they can replace or rebuild most things that have been lost and start new careers if necessary. They are forced into the realization that life itself is the most important thing and the lives of those that we love. In some catastrophes even the lives of those we love may have been lost. Even in those darkest of hours, most eventually find strength within themselves to go on.

this-is-meIt is important, as I have expressed here a few times, that you have a strong sense of self and that you love who and what you are; not letting your sense of self-worth be based upon possessions or job.  That’s not to say that you should become self-centered; but, rather, that you become self-confident. If your self-examination of who and what you have become leaves something to be desired, then you have something to work upon and not something to be depressed about. Since no one is perfect, you are always on a self-improvement journey to be the best you that you can be (see my post – see my post Don’t give up the chase…).

Perhaps a good way to start each day is with a little personal assessment about where you are in life and what things you might do today to get to where you want to be. It is also a good idea to acknowledge God’s role in your life and to ask for his help in prayer. Iman praying can’t think of a better way to start the day than being square with yourself and with God. Bring it on, world! I know who I am and where I’m headed and I’ve got God in my corner. Talk about self-confidence as you face the day.

Have a great and self-confident day. God’s got your back.

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Posted by Norm Werner