Look for the rainbow or be the rainbow…

June 21, 2015

“Everyone wants happiness.  No one wants pain.  But you can’t make a rainbow, without a little rain.”  (Quoted by Dolly Parton) – A quote seen on the Jack’s Winning Words blog some time ago.

single momIt’s certainly true that life throws us curveballs from time to time; sometimes much worse than that. Life happens and sometimes it involves pain – the loss of a loved one, the breakup of a relationship or friendship or maybe a major disappointment or disruption at work or the loss of a job or perhaps just overwhelming bills an d problems.  We live through these things somehow, but for some that is it – they just survive and live on in misery, unable to let go or go on with normal life. All that they see is the darkness. They aren’t even looking for the rainbow.

It’s important, when you encounter someone like that, that you try to help them find a rainbow in their life, something positive that they can embrace that will let them move on.  Maybe that rainbow is you and your caring friendship. One of the hallmarks of the depression that can set in with the pain is the feeling of beingcaring alone, of feeling like you are the only one who has ever experienced what you are going through. That isolation is self-imposed and  just adds to the problem.  Just being there for that person, so that they don’t feel alone can make all of the difference.

If you’re the one who has suffered a setback in life, it’s important to be able to see past the current trouble and find a rainbow in your life that makes you happy. For many that may be their spouse or their children. For some the rainbow may be their faith, which can certainly be a source of strength and happiness, if you let it into your life.

I think one important note is that you will likely find what you are looking for. If you are a doom and gloom person who is always looking for the worst to happen then it probably will (many times with your help). If, on the other hand, you have rainbow in betweena positive and upbeat attitude, then things will work out and you’ll find your rainbow. That choice is up to you.

So try to find the rainbows in your everyday life and step up and be the rainbow for someone else. else. You’ll be surprised if you do that because you will see the rare double rainbow.

Be a rainbow today…

May 13, 2015

“Try to be the rainbow in someone’s cloud.”  (Maya Angelou) When I saw that recently on the Jack’s Winning Words blog, I knew that I had to write something about it.

Everybody has cloudy days, sad days, days of anxiety or fear, days of remorse or sorrow, perhaps just boring day; days caringwhen we could use a rainbow to cheer us up. We all also have the ability to be the person (the rainbow) who goes a little out of their ways to cheer up someone else who is having a bad day.

Some people have an almost automatic reflex to help other whom they see are in need; however, for many of us (I count myself in that number) that is not an immediate reaction. We hesitate, reluctant to “get involved.”  Maybe we mumble a few words of encouragement to them as we scurry past or perhaps we give them a quick hug, or utter a brief “I’m so sorry” and then hurry on with our day. We were polite. We were politically correct. We did our part; but we weren’t a rainbow in that person’s cloudy day.

Being a rainbow means actually taking the time to listen to the person having that cloudy day and paying attention. It girls huggingmeans asking that second question and maybe more, in order to better understand the issue that is causing the problem. It means holding on to that hug for a little longer or just reaching out and touching them in a way that says “I care.” It may mean opening up and sharing something from your life – a similar situation or one of equal seriousness to you and relating how you were able to deal with it. It may mean calling upon the Faith that you’ve spent your whole life developing and sharing it with this person. Hopefully, that Faith is the pot of gold at the end of your rainbow.

men huggingBeing a rainbow in someone’s life is yet another area where women seem to have the advantage over men. Women will run towards someone in emotional pain; while men might turn away and try not to get involved. Hugs (at least meaningful ones) don’t come easily for most men, especially if it’s for another man. Yet a fist bump or back slap doesn’t convey the same feelings. And most men hate to relate stories about times when they were down or needed help. They think that shows weakness. The essence of being a rainbow for somebody is being able to reach out from your soul and touch their soul. The rainbow doesn’t come from over there on the horizon, it comes from inside; it comes from the soul.

Pablo Neruda put it well when he wrote in The Book of Questions – “Donde termina el arco iris, en tu alma o en el horizonte?  – Where does the rainbow end, in your soul or on the horizon?”rainbow in between

Perhaps he would agree that if the rainbow actually starts in your soul and reaches out to touch the soul another; and, that is a beautiful thing. So, don’t add to the gloom of the day. Resolve to be the rainbow in someone’s life today. I suspect that just going about your day with an attitude that says “How can I help someone today?” will make your day better too.

Have a great and brightly colored day! I hope that we meet today, so that I can see how beautiful you can be.