So, get back up and move on…

September 11, 2023

On this 9-11 anniversary, remember the advice that Pastor Jack Freed shared in 2006 –

 “Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”  (Confucius) Many of us recall sadly seeing falling buildings and falling airplanes five years ago. Our country remembers and our country shall recover. It’s the same way when we have “falls” in our personal lives. We shall recover! 😉  Jack

For those who were alive at the time the events of September 11, 2002, will never be forgotten. People will remember where they were and how they found out about the attack and how horrible it felt to witness the fall of the towers on television. The resulting shock and confused lasted for days as Americans tried to process feelings of vulnerability and anger. Suffice it to say that our world changed forever that day.

Jack used that momentous example to give us advice about our personal lives. I write here quite often about perseverance and dealing with adversity. Falling or failing are natural parts of our lives and each of us develops some process for dealing with those setbacks. Some wallow in self-pity or perhaps enter a state of denial. Most of us take a pause, some just to recover from the initial pain of the failure and some to start using that failure as a learning experience for future attempts.

No matter how you deal with a setback the most important first step is to get back up. Even those who wallow in self-pity eventually get back up and realize that whatever it was that happened, it did not kill them. They survived, so what is next.

It is important to refocus from the past (the event or trauma) onto the future – the “what’s next” – to recover and move on with life. And move on one must. In hugely tragic scenarios, such as 9-11 and the recent earthquake in Moraco, moving on might involve dealing with the loss of loved ones, perhaps with everything except your life. Those are the times in which your faith is tested and during which it may be your sole (and soul) support. God had a purpose for sparing you and you must now focus upon discovering and fulfilling that purpose.

Many times, those who survive and recover from traumatic events become inspirational figures for others. Some embrace that role and become motivational speakers. Most just learn to live with it and humbly accept becoming a role model for others.

So, the bottom line in Jack’s message and all of these words that I have written is to get back up and go on with life. The world moves on, life moves on and you must move on, too. If you need someone to lean on; lean on God, who has a purpose for you.

Get up, find your purpose and move on.

1 Comment | faith, Inspiration | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

To be a better you…

September 5, 2023

The Best of Jack’s Winning Words 9/5/23
“When you forgive, you live. When you let go, you grow.” (Sent by Sandi) INC. magazine published an article on How to Be a Better Person. Practice forgiveness was one suggestion. Be open to change was another. Others: Let go of anger; Be honest; Listen to what’s being said; Be polite and respectful…and there were more. The point is that we’ve all made mistakes. If we want to grow beyond our failings and be a better person, it begins with action on our part. 🙂  Jack 

The gist of Jack’s message in that post was that you must do more than just wish you were a better person; you must take actions to change. Forgiving and letting go are two of the most important actions that you must embrace.

Forgiving and letting go are not just actions that you take towards other, but important steps with yourself, if you are to grow and live the life that you dream about. You must forgive your past mistakes and learn from them. You must let go of any hate and anger that you have of yourself from your past, accept who you are now and move on.

Wallowing in self-pity or self-loathing is a recipe for failure and despair. You can’t undo the things that you have done or unsee the things that you’ve seen, but you can look past that rearview mirror and focus on the road ahead. The past never changes, but the world in front of you is ever changing and demands your full attention.

Take that first step. Stand in front of a mirror and look yourself in the eyes. Then say out loud, “I forgive me.” Say it until you mean it. Say it until you feel yourself letting go of the past. You have put your past out of your way forward. If you need help with this step, try the little prayer that I’ve posted here many times, “Not my will, but thy will be done.” Surrendering to God’s will is a powerful way to let go.

Now, take that next step into your new future. It’s time for you to grow.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

I dare you…

September 2, 2023

The truth is far from that line of reasoning. Most people will actually think more of them for having tried, even if they failed. Moreover, failure on an initial effort is not the end; it is the beginning of learning and adapting. Failure is an integral part of the process and a step along the way to that better life that you’ve always wanted.

For most people the dare in today’s graphic will remain something that they dream about but don’t do. Why? The biggest reason for most is the fear of failure. They don’t even try because they fear failing in the effort. They think that they will embarrass themselves or their loved-ones in that failure. Retreating to the comfort of not even trying seems to them to be the best decision.

It is an interesting phenomenon that just by trying you are already living that life that you dreamed of. In the process of achieving the things that you have been imagining you are turning the dreams into reality – a new reality for you; something that you always wanted.

One cannot usually just jump from one life to another. You cannot achieve everything that you’ve dream about by just snapping your fingers (that only works in Marvel movies). It will usually take work and perhaps great effort to live that dream life; so break the journey down into small achievable steps and step off to that new life. Just getting started is a victory and you should celebrate it and all of the other small victories that you achieve along the way.

And when you have setbacks (and there will be setbacks) turn them into learning experiences. You now know something that didn’t work. Figure out a different approach and step off in that direction. Keep your goal in front of you and let it continually inspire you. Don’t be too proud or too stubborn to ask for help when you need it. Start by asking for God’s help. You can’t get a better companion on your journey.

Finally, stop, stick your head up, and take a look around from time to time. Another interesting thing happens to many on these journeys toward a dream – they find a place along the way that suits them just fine and they decide to stay there. That’s OK, too, so long as you made the decision to stop and you feel good about where you are.

Go on. Dare to live the life you’ve always wanted. I dare you.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Keep renewing and improving…

August 28, 2023

From The Best of Jack’s Winning Words comes the post below that was originally penned by Jack on September 23, 2020. “Jack” was Pastor Jack Freed who  posted words of wisdom and encouragement five days a week for many years before passing away on Dece4mber 20, 2022. His son now reposts the best of Jack’s posts over the years.

“I’m not who I was yesterday.” (Alice in Wonderland) I’ve read that our body cells are continuing to die and be replaced, so that we are never who we were yesterday (a complete change in 7 years!). There’s a button you can wear: PBPGINFWMY.  It stands for: Please Be Patient God Is Not Finished With Me Yet. Every day is an opportunity to improve the self that we were yesterday. I don’t know about you, but I’m glad to have a chance at improvement. 😉  Jack

While the physical aspects of our bodies renew themselves at the cellular level is interesting, it is the mental aspect of renewing and growing each day that Jack emphasized, and which gives us the continual opportunity to be a better person than we were yesterday.

Jack’s post mentioned that our bodies completely renew all of our cells every 7 years. The good news is that you don’t have to wait 7 years to renew and reinvent yourself mentally. You can do that by examining things that have become habits and discarding those that are injurious to your well-being and introducing new, good habits. Studies have shown that it takes an average of 2 weeks for a new behavior to become a habit.

The impact of stopping bad, old habits can be instantaneous, but some habits are harder to just quit than others – witness all of the stop smoking ads on TV. Here are a few things might help you make your desired changes in your life:

1, Break it down – There is a saying that “He bit off more than he could chew”. One of the most common mistakes is trying to do too much too fast. Making major changes in your life can be a big task, so break the change down into smaller, achievable steps. In the movie “What about Bob”, that was called taking “baby steps”. So take baby steps in the new direction that you want your life to go.

2. Be accountable – Of course you are accountable to yourself; however, many people find it helpful to have an “accountability partner”, someone that you meet with regularly and with whom you share your goals and to whom you report your progress. Ask that partner to hold you accountable for making progress towards those goals and to call BS when you try got make excuses.

3. Forgive yourself and move on – You will have failures and setbacks. Do not wallow in self-pity or give up just because you had a setback. In many cases, you may have to forgive yourself for having made a poor decision. Don’t beat yourself up. Forgive yourself and move on towards your goal. If nothing else, view your mistake as a learning experience.

4. Don’t do it alone – While you may have an accountability partner, they will not be expected to do it with you. Making small or even major changes in your life is a very personal thing. That does not mean that you must do it alone. Calling on God’s help is one of the most personal things you can do and one of the most rewarding. Get out of the loner mentality of “I’ve got this” and into mindset that “We’ve got this” with God and you will feel an immediate sense of empowerment. After all, the Bible says, “If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31)

5. Be patient and persistent – Our short attention spans often turn to frustration when things don’t happen as fast as we’d like. Change takes time and you must give it time. Patience and persistence build character and wisdom, both of which are good things.

6. Celebrate your victories – No matter how small the steps that you take may be, take the time to celebrater and reward yourself for the small victories that those steps represent. Repeat to yourself the line from Alice in Wonderland – “I’m not who I was yesterday”, and that’s a good thing.

Jack mentioned a button that he saw somewhere – PBPGINFWMY.  It stands for: Please Be Patient God Is Not Finished With Me Yet. Maybe you should wear a button that instead says INFWMY – I’m Not Finished With Me Yet.

Keep renewing, keep changing, keep improving.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Turn them into memories…

August 21, 2023

“The goal is to die with memories, not dreams.”  (Tiny Buddha) 

Today’s saying comes from the Best of Jack’s Winning Words blog – a blog being carried on by the son of the late Pastor Jack Freed.

I thought this graphic also fit.

We all have dreams, hopes and aspirations. Some just remain dreams. Hopefully you act on many (if not all) of those dreams and they become fond memories later in life. The phrase, “We’ll always have Paris”  refers to a dream accomplished to visit the City of Lights in France. Most people end life with at least a few fond memories of dreams that they made come true even it they weren’t trips to Paris.

The graphic today makes the important point not to give up on those dreams. Rather, you should set them as goals. A funny thing happens when you convert a dream into a goal – you start planning and working to achieve it. The real becomes real and, if you are patient and persistent, it eventually becomes a memory. Along the way you will make other memories of the journey to accomplishing that dream.

Turn your dreams into memories that you will fondly look back upon. Some will always have Paris, but only you will always have your memories of your dreams that you made come true.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration | Tagged: , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Seek the right thing…

August 18, 2023

The graphic for today’s posts points to one of the major causes of mental distress and even depression – the pursuit of perfection. That is not to say that one should not always be trying to be better – better at your job, a better spouse and parent at home and a—in-all just being a better person. It is in pushing beyond better and becoming obsessed with perfection that can lead to bad outcomes.

In recent years we have all been witness to some amazing admissions by revered athletes that their pursuit of perfection in their sports has caused them debilitating mental distress. Athletes, especially world-class athletes, put tremendous pressure on themselves to be perfect. That is especially true in sports that have judging systems that deduct points for any little bobble or imperfection in execution. Unfortunately, all sports are designed around a win-lose model. One person or team must win and the other must lose in whatever is being contested. Life can feel like that, too, if one sees it as a series of win-lose situations. If we let that view dominate our lives it is quite natural to also pursue perfection and to see anything less than perfection as a loss. That is a formula for failure and unhappiness.

How can you change your life such that you pursue progress rather than perfection? The first step is to understand how your life will be judged and who the judge will be. The Bible tells us that there is, and always will be, just one judge who will come to judge the living and dead – Jesus. God will not be judging you by how fast you can run, how many baskets you make or how many touchdowns you scored. From everything we have been taught, God’s scorecard will tally the positive impact that you have had on the lives of others.

In my church we pray every week for forgiveness for things done and things left undone. Therefore, making progress means being aware of the things that I should not do for which I will later have to ask for forgiveness. It also means being more aware of the things that I otherwise might not do and making a greater effort (progress) at them, so that I have less reason to ask for forgiveness for not doing them. It means not passing by on the other side if I see someone who needs help. It means being as concerned for the well-being other others as I am for myself. It means ending each day with a sense of satisfaction for what I have done, rather than with a a sense of guilt for what I have left undone.

Will I ever reach perfection? No, but I can at least make progress each day and be satisfied with that. What about you? Are you seeking progress or perfection?

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Don’t get bent out of shape…

August 7, 2023

“Blessed are the flexible, for they will not be bent out of shape.”  (Unknown) That saying is from a post today on the Best of Jack’s Winning Words blog. Pastor Jack Freed for years posted 5 days a week on his blog, Jack’s Winning Words. When he passed away his son decided to repost some of the best posts that Jack had made over the years. I quite often found Jack’s posts to be inspirational for posts to my own blog and these reposts continue to inspire.

There is a big difference between being flexible in life and having no values of one’s own. One can still have values and principles upon which they base their life, but still be flexible enough to “roll with the punches” that life throws our way. Indeed, it is rigid inflexibility that has led to the extreme political divide that we now have in America. Neither side is willing to be flexible in their positions on key issues. Instead, they take to the barricades and hurl insults (or worse) at each other. Misinformation And disinformation become weapons of choice to confuse or misdirect those who have not yet formed an opinion.

What is abandoned in inflexibility is even the attempt to find a compromise. When almost everyone rushes to extreme positions in politics or on issues, there are few left to seek and suggest ways to compromise so that everyone feels some sense of satisfaction with the outcome. Just trying to shout louder or longer about the issue than the other side is not an answer. Nor is using some temporary legal advantage to erect legal barriers to the other side’s position.

But, politics aside, what about flexibility in our personal lives?

Being described as rigid and inflexible does not seem to be all that attractive to me. On the other hand, being described as a “yes man” is also not appealing. I think being described as “honest, willing to listen and open to new ideas”  would be about the best thing that someone could say about you and that would be describing someone who is flexible.

Being flexible does not mean that you can be manipulated, although some may try. It means being able to evaluate different points of view as well as the facts in any situation and perhaps reaching a conclusion that may differ from your initial position. If you have moved off your old position, you have probably compromised and certainly have shown some flexibility.

So, don’t get bent out of shape the next time things or decisions aren’t going exactly as you had planned. Instead, be flexible. Stop and consider the alternatives that are being presented to you and the different points of view. Seek a compromise. You may be surprised that you and the other parties involved can agree upon an answer that lets everyone feel good about it. Life does not have to be a win-lose proposition; it can be win-win.

Don’t get bent out of shape. Be flexible and win.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration | Tagged: | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Believe in God and believe in you…

August 2, 2023

After a win on he field we often hear athletes thanking “those who believed in me.” The truth is usually that they believed in themselves, and the others came along for the ride. People with self-confidence and belief in themselves and what they are doing tend to attract others – supporters and fans. That is true in athletics, in business and in life in general.

Another thing that I’ve observed about people who believe in themselves and their abilities is that they often have a strong belief in God and that God is in their corner in their efforts. You often see athletes stop and thank God after a success on the field. It seems that believing in God is the foundation upon which they build their belief in themselves. Perhaps faith in God is the first step to faith in oneself.

Having faith in yourself is essential in business, too, and in life in general. One who does not possess faith in themselves might spend their entire life in fear – fear of failure, which prevents them from even trying. A strong belief in God doesn’t necessarily take away all fears, it just allows you to deal with them better. With a strong belief in God, fear does not paralyze; instead, it raises a caution and causes one to stop and plan how to overcome whatever is driving that fear. That planning is always based upon moving ahead; not standing still, frozen in fear.

I have advocated here in the past that even a simple little prayer based upon a sports phrase will help. So, the next time that you are facing a daunting task stop and ask God for “a little help, here.” It will put you into a positive frame of mind and allow you to “see” the way forward. With that litel help from God you will have the self-confidence that you need.

Indeed, you will be halfway there.

Leave a Comment » | faith, Inspiration | Tagged: , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

Celebrate your wins…

July 31, 2023

This past weekend Lee Hodges won his first PGA Tour event at the 3M Open. The TV announcers made sure that the audience knew that he had played in 65 PGA events without a win. Players on the Tour and the announcers who cover it on TV know that it is not easy to win on the PGA Tour. It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to stick with the practices and it takes determination and self-confidence to persevere through the disappointments. But, as the announcers also pointed out, there is nothing like that first win, that victory that you have been working so hard to achieve for so long.

It is not unusual to see athletes break down into tears when they have final achieved a goal or won a match or game for which they had been training for some time. That is why the Olympics next year will be so dramatic for so many athletes. They will have trained for 4 years for those winning moments.

In our everyday lives there are probably things that you have been working towards (training for) for a long time. These are not trivial little things to you. Maybe they are life goals for education or achieving some level at work. Perhaps they are positions of responsibility that you aspire to or maybe they involve seeing the success of a child or spouse that you have worked hard to support.

Whatever your victory or success, take the time to celebrate and relish it. Reflect for a few moments on the hard work involved and let yourself admit that it was worth it. Sure, you can look forward to new goals and start working towards them; but take a breath and take a moment to give yourself a pat on the back. You did it! You reached that goal that has been driving you for so long. Feel good about it. Give a fist pump for yourself. Put that win in your mental trophy case and look at it for a few moments before you move on with life.

Celebrate your wins.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration, Pure fun | Tagged: , , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

If you love to walk…

July 27, 2023

If you love to walk there are some great places to live in Michigan. There are various ways to measure the “walkability” of an area, town or city. These usually involve some evaluation of what is within easy walking distance – basically what you can get to or what you can get done within some walkable radius. Other factors include the ease with which you can walk, i.e. are their sidewalks and what amenities might exist to support or welcome walkers, such as benches, signage in crosswalks giving pedestrians  the right of way, and such.

I wondered about how walkable the cities in Michigan are and found a ranking of them online. The most walkable city in Michigan turned out to be Hamtramck, with a walk score of 82. The top ten cities, in order and with their score were:

City                                           Walk Score

Hamtramck                                     82

Ferndale                                          67

Ypsilanti                                           62

Lincoln Park                                    60

Wyandotte                                      60

Birmingham                                   60

Dearborn                                        58

Royal Oak                                        57

Eastpointe                                       57

Madison Heights                            57

I was kind of surprised that Ann Arbor didn’t make the top 10, but it did come in at #14 with a walk score of 52.

This list can be found at https://www.walkscore.com/MI/#:~:text=The%20best%20cities%20in%20Michigan,%2C%20Norton%20Shores%2C%20and%20Romulus

It is a list made up only of cities in the state, so my little Village of Milford isn’t in that list. One can find out the walk Score for your own are by gong to https://www.walkscore.com/score/

When I did that and put in the Village of Milford, I was not surprised that is came back as a very walkable place to live with a walk score of 74. I live within three blocks and can easily walk to a micro-brewery, 10 restaurants, 2 barber shops, over 25 cute retail stores, several hairdressers, three skin care businesses, chiropractors, tattoo parlors, accountants, lawyers’ offices, and more. There’s even a major brand grocery store and a well-known drug store within easy walking distance.

I moved to the Village of Milford from a typical bedroom suburban community in which you had to get in your car and drive to get to almost anything, so this was all new and different for me. Now it just seems natural to say, “I’ll walk down and pick up my prescription” or let’s walk downtown for dinner.

See how the area that you live in scores on walkability at the site referenced above and if you are planning to buy a new house, check out the area it is in to see how walkable it might be. For many that will be a big factor in their move decision.

Leave a Comment » | Inspiration, Pure fun, Real Estate | Tagged: , | Permalink
Posted by Norm Werner

« Previous Entries
Next Entries »