As a Realtor, I’ve written more than once about the 3-P’s that a seller must keep in mind when listing their house – Price, Persistence and Patience. I help with setting the price, but the last two are really up to them. They must be persistent in getting the house ready to show before they leave for work each day and they must be patient with the process, especially if their home is in the price bands above $300,000 that are particularly slow right now.
Recently the pastor at my church preached on the topic of the 3-P’s of prayer, which he named as Pattern, Persistence and Payoff.
I assumed at the beginning of the sermon that the Pattern part of the 3-P’s was about getting into a routine (a pattern) of praying; however, the pastor explained that Pattern is about the structure of the prayer and pointed to the lesson that Jesus taught the Disciples when they 
asked him how they should pray. He gave them a pattern that we now call the Lord’s Prayer. In Matthew 6:9–13 (ESV), Jesus said “Pray then like this: ‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.'”
Jesus established a Pattern with that prayer that is useful for all prayers. The first part acknowledges who you are praying too and pays God the homage that He is due. It also acknowledges that it is His will that will be done and not your own. It also reminds us of our responsibility to forgive others and clear our hearts of hate or prejudices or grudges. Then you can make your request. That simple pattern accomplishes everything that you need when praying.
The second part of the pastor’s message was Persistence – the fact is that you must pray more than once and pray as often as you can for the things that you need and want God to
help you with. Too often in our modern, “instant gratification” world we have expectations of immediate action from God to grant our prayers. God doesn’t work like that. The pastor didn’t make this point, but I started to think that perhaps it takes longer than we might wish because we have yet to uphold our end of the bargain that is stated in the Lord’s Prayer – we have not forgiven our debtors ( or those who trespass (or sin) against us in different versions of the prayer). Perhaps God is waiting for us to get our act together a bit better before he grants our prayer. Have we forgiven those who trespassed against us in some way? If we do not have forgiveness in our hearts, perhaps we should pray for that first.
That last part was a part of the message that the pastor delivered about the last “P” in the 3-P’s of prayer – the Payoff. Now this part of the message wasn’t about praying to win the lottery and having God dump the winning ticket in your hands. That’s not how it works and, in fact, God may be answering your prayers in ways that you just don’t understand. 
Perhaps you are praying for God to somehow help you get something in particular because you think that will make you happy – maybe it’s a job, money, or a new possession of some sort or perhaps a date with a specific person. Maybe instead God is answering your prayer to be more happy by showing you ways to be happy with what you have and who you are. Is God answering your prayers? In His own way; yes, He is. You just don’t yet understand. If we believe that God acts in our best interests, then we must also accept his answer to our prayers, even if we don’t understand the answers.
There have been many little things in my life that I have said a little prayer for and then may have forgotten about; yet when I look back at how things turned out, I have to thank God for the answers that he worked out for me. Oft times his answer was not to give me
what I had asked for and I look back later and I realize that not getting that thing worked out better for me. God took me in a different direction and I have to thank Him for that. The “His will be done” part worked out better for me. Often, the hard part is letting go of the idea that I can solve problems by myself and letting Him work his will in my life.
I liked what the pastor had to say in his sermon; however, I might combine his 3-P’s with mine from real estate and say that a good guide for life might be these three P’s – Prayer, Persistence and Patience. If you can live by those three P’s you’ll achieve the forth P – the payoff – a peace that passes all understanding.
Have a great week ahead and say a little prayer before you start each day. Remember the 3-P’s of prayer – Pattern, Persistence and Payoff.
Posted by Norm Werner 
As a society we have become too fixated on score keeping, on winning and losing, on a zero sum game philosophy of life that somehow relates winning for one person meaning that someone else must lose. One of our presidential candidates seems to take great pleasure in characterizing people with whom he disagrees on various topics as “losers”.
endured years and years of what most would see as a loss, suffering in prison for his anti-apartheid activities. Yet Mandela did not let his imprisonment conquer is will and his soul. At the end of each day of imprisonment Mandela could claim another day of winning – a victory of his soul and spirit over those who sought to break him.
might have wanted to do in order to help someone who perhaps struggles to do anything at all? I think so. Is it a win to spend time with a shut-in who otherwise might just sit and stare out the window at traffic going by? I think so. Is it a win to take the money that you otherwise might have spent on another pair of shoes or another outfit and donate it instead to help those without any shoes and standing naked or in tatters? I think so. What do you really lose in those situations, when compared to how much you gain (win) in your soul?
we give up the pursuit of perfection (sort of like Mercedes with their cars).
that you were striving for or get turned down that date that you finally worked up the courage to ask for or perhaps suffered through yet another snub or social rejection. You’re not perfect. Life isn’t perfect. Accept the temporary setback, analyze what you did or didn’t do correctly to achieve that goal and try to learn from it. More important yet, think about how this incident in your life has helped you grow as a person.
clearly and putting life into better perspective.
burst their balloon or to make a cruel or cutting remark. It may even be easier to be critical of that person or something that they just did than it is to find something to praise; however, those words of praise, if you can find them, can make a world of positive difference in that
some sort. That difference doesn’t make them a nobody to be ignored or scuffled aside. Maybe they don’t talk like everyone else in your group or perhaps they don’t dress the same or act the same. Perhaps their very differences are what should be interesting you. Maybe you can learn something from them; if nothing else you can perhaps see their different point of view and take that into consideration. You’ll never know until you make the effort. Be somebody today.
you’re the person who went out of their way to reach out and make others feel good about themselves. And, do you know what? it will make you feel great to because you chose to be somebody today.
them.” (John Green) That’s certainly true in today’s air conditioned houses where people come and go through their garage and are never seen on the front porch or out in the yard. I’ve even had clients who had to get new front door locks because they never use that door and had no idea where the keys were any more.
mat that he saw somewhere that reads: “As far as anyone knows, we’re a nice happy family.”
that the deception was “for the kids.” Most of the time, the kids (especially the older children) can sense that something wasn’t right between mommy and daddy.
they hold it in; however that eventually leads them to becoming moody or angry or fearful and feeling lonely. They don’t seek outside help and they turn away from the very support structure that is right there under roof with them. As they withdraw the relationship often turns sour due to confusion or a sense of loss of interest on the part of their significant other and eventually that isolation leads to a breakup of the marriage. Sadly I saw that a lot in the recent Great Recession as men reacted badly to job losses or even to the loss of their spouse’s job.
The other thing that I have seen more of than I can understand are couples who have finally called an abusive or manipulative relationship quits. While that is normally an action taken by the women involved, I have seen the opposite when a weak man finally has had enough from an overly strong and domineering wife. I have also seen it in the GLBT community. I’ve never really understood why someone would commit to be in an abusive relationship to begin with; however, people that I’ve talked to about that said that it didn’t start that way or that the abusive partner changed after they entered the relationship.
families often go to great lengths to keep the deception of a normal home alive for the external world. In some cases the family may seek help for the substance abuser, but in other cases the old saw “We don’t talk about that” seems to hold sway. All too often the substance abuser eventually turns into just an abuser, due to the huge mood swings and stresses that accompany the habit. Eventually these unions also break up and I’m called in to sell the family home.
minimum you need to be able to have open and honest discussions about the things that aren’t going as you would like and how you both are reacting to those things. I really don’t want to meet you and be asked to sell your house because of your divorce. I much rather that you call me because your moving to accommodate a new beginning in a new job or getting ready to expand your family. Maybe you can get back to being that happy family that was mentioned on the welcome mat that everyone thought you were all along.
something that drives you to take actions. Finding something that you are passionate about is not an everyday thing. For many it is, in fact, a rare thing. It’s not that there are not things that they enjoy doing, we all have those things; it’s just that that are not driven to do them. I enjoy an occasional round of golf, but I am nor passionate about golf. There are many things like that in my life and I’m sure in yours that we could say we enjoy but have no particular passion about. Passion might be thought of as enthusiasm taken to the next level.
you have a passion about something when you realize that it is the most important thing in your life, at least for the moment. It’s hard to sustain and intense level of passion for an extended period; however, a true passion will never subside enough to be forgotten.
passionate about saving our original old train station; the one that was built when the railroad finally came through Milford in the mid 1800’s. It was buried for years beneath layers of modern siding and added on sections of what was a lumber yard. It was due to be torn down as part of a redevelopment project; however, one man with passion for saving it started a movement that has gained momentum and now has a chance of pulling off a plan to uncover it and move it rather than tear it down. Many Village and area residents have joined him to raise money, take the case to the Village government and continue the effort to “save the station.” All it took was passion.
age that moderation is the better path. Moderation is less likely to evoke negative reactions from others. We are taught to stifle ourselves (remember that line from the Archie Bunker TV show when he told his wife Edith to “stifle yourself, Edith”?) We are encouraged to sit back quietly and let others make displays of passion in demonstrations or other actions. We are trained to be apathetic and apathy is the antithesis of Passion.
then find an outlet for that passion. It may not be in a big demonstration or a march; it may not be in being able to solve the problem all at once; maybe it’s in something small, like helping to clean up a park or roadside or maybe just writing a letter to an official to express your passion and opinion. Whatever you do; make it just the start and watch your passion grow as you take those first little steps. A true passion will flare up like a flame when you are taking actions and then settle down to a constantly glowing ember in your soul in your day to day life.
means to recollect some of the co-workers and friends that I had while in that job. Most job-related friends tended to fall away, once I was no longer in those jobs; although I’ve still got one friend from a job-related relationship with whom I still play golf and socialize with.
there was little that we had in common once the job that we all related to had vanished. As I reflect on the time when I was there it is now apparent to me that the only topic of conversation that we had at the various social gatherings that we had was job related. How boring of a time that must have been for our spouses.
So, perhaps it’s OK to reflect on our prior lives once in a while, but none of us can go back and relive whatever fond memories that we might have. We were different people then. Maybe we can learn a few things from that reflection that might help us in our current lives; but we are different people now and must live in the present and perhaps still dream of the future.
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