Oh no you don’t…

January 5, 2021

Film actress Greta Garbo is famously known for the line “I want to alone”. But does anyone really want to be alone? In today’s post to his blog, Jack’s Winning Words, Pastor Freed shared with us this quote – “In nature nothing exists alone.”  (Rachel Carson)

Freed went on to write about how many of the world’s creatures are disappearing, which could leave us alone if it keeps up (and mankind is the cause of much of the extinction of species). Freed made the point that, in nature, all things are connected and that it is important to be concerned  (and do something) about the alarming loss of species in today’s world. I join him in that concern, but today I want to write about many of us feeling alone, especially in the midst of this pandemic.

We may have the feeling that we want to be alone sometimes, usually when something is overwhelming us and we need time (and peace) to think. I think, however, that few of us would really want to be truly alone for any length of time. Even if events place us in a situation where we are alone (like Tom Hanks in the movie Castaway), we don’t want to be alone. Hank’s character invented the companion Wilson, a Volleyball with what looked like a face in blood on it. Fortunately, for Christians, we do not have to invent a “Wilson” character for ourselves – we know that God is always with us.

We probably all know someone who absolutely hates to be alone. The restrictions of the current pandemic have been especially hard on those people, who have been forced into isolation (at least it feels that way to them). While most of us aren’t feeling that isolated, the current situation has forced many of us to confront more alone time than we’ve ever experienced before. That does not have to be a bad thing or even a scary thing. You can help both yourself and those that you may know who are more isolated than others, but reaching out with phone calls, cards or other means, to touch them with a message of concern about their well-being. A simple call to ask, “How are you doing”, can work wonders for their day.

The other things that this forced isolation gives us time to work on is our feelings about ourselves. I have posted here a few times about loving yourself. Most people feel the need for acceptance by others about how they look or about the things that they have accomplished in life. They are seeking confirmation for the conclusions that they have already reached about themselves. Some, however, are so unsure of themselves (so unloving of themselves) that the opinions of others becomes an obsession. I think it is important to accept that if God love you, no matter what, you should accept yourself just as unconditionally and be comfortable with who you are. Out of love for yourself will come the ability to share love with others and any feeling of being alone will melt away.

So the message becomes, get back in touch with God and accept God’s love; then get back in touch with yourself and love who you are. Now, go out and share that love with others. You are not alone; you were just getting ready.

Have a great day sharing the love!

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Posted by Norm Werner

Follow the leaders …

January 1, 2021

Fearful people teach us what can’t be done. Leaders show us what can be done – from a blog titled How to Think Positive Thoughts by Growthpaths.net

A consistent complaint heard from healthcare experts concerning the Coronavirus pandemic is about the lack of leadership at the national level. That lack of a clear strategy and any attempt at leadership has now resulted in the chaos that is unfolding in the immunization effort.

The Federal government’s lack of leadership has thrown the responsibility for planning and administering the vaccine developed under the Warp Speed program onto the states and their already overstressed public health departments. Now the nightly news shows are filled with stories of poor execution of the inoculation programs at the state level. The problem really starts at the top with a President more concerned with his failed reelection bid and tweeting about conspiracy theories than providing clear leadership in a time of national crisis.

What are we to do? There will soon be a change at the top and the President-elect has indicated that he will take a strong leadership position in this fight against the virus. That certainly will help. We can also get behind the leaders at our state and local levels who are trying to provide some guidance on preventing or slowing the spread of the disease. The stock phrase “we are all in this together” has never been truer that it is right now. While there is some truth in the claims of unequal healthcare access made by the black and brown communities, the virus itself plays no favorites – it is an equal access killer.

The idea of getting solidly behind our leaders in this effort is no different than it would be if we were facing an invasion by some human enemy or even from space. Can you imagine if space aliens were walking around shooting people with ray guns and there would be people ignoring the warning not to go out when they are around? Maybe if there was a magic shield that our leaders advised us we  could put on so that the aliens could not see us, would people disregard that safety option and still venture out without their shield? Yet that is want is happening with our current battle against the COVID-19 enemy. The masks that we have been advised to wear to make us less visible to the virus are ignored by far too many people.

One has only to look at the example set by the people of New Zealand. They followed the guidance of their leaders, even as it involved a painful total shutdown of all foreign travel in and out of the country and a lockdown within the country. They are the only nation of earth that has totally stopped the virus. Their leaders showed great political will and resolve and I’m sure faced some level of popular resistance; however, they preserved and won.

Perhaps, with the change of leadership (or maybe one should say, finally with the presence of leadership) in Washington we will see the United States make progress in defeating this enemy. Let us all hope.

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Posted by Norm Werner

You control your future…

December 30, 2020

In today’s post to his Blog, Jack’s Winning Words, Pastor Freed used this quote – “We shrink from change; yet is there anything that can come into being without it?”  (Marcus Aurelius) 

Many people do shrink from change because they fear the future; for them change is a scary thing and the future represents change and the unknown that they fear. Others dive headlong into the future, anticipating great things from the changes that it holds. Wherein lies the difference?

I would submit that the difference is in the attitudes that each has about themselves. The fearful see themselves as victims of the future, hapless and hopelessly being dragged into whatever calamities the future brings. The fearless see themselves meeting the challenges that they may encounter with persistent resolve to prevail. The fearful wish to hide, the fearless wish to overcome. What makes the difference?

I’ve posted here a few times about being at peace with yourself, which is the foundation of being fearless about the future. That foundation, like the foundation of a house, does not hold itself up. Before pouring the foundation of a house, the builder must first put in footings. I think most people know what footings are in construction terms – the reinforced concrete base upon which the foundation is built. I like the second definition in the dictionary – the basis on which something is established or operates.

I submit that people who are at peace with themselves (and thus fearless about the future) have established that foundation upon the footings of a strong faith in God. That faith is the basis upon which they operate and holds up the foundation of their life. No matter how scary the situation, when it gets down to the base of their foundation they find God there and they are reassured that when God is with them, nothing can prevail against them. That reinforces their foundation and allows them to overcome the fears arrayed against them. They find calm in the midst of chaos because their faith in God is the basis upon which they operate.

So, you need not shrink from the future nor be fearful of it. Instead, make sure that you start each day by reestablishing in prayer that you have based the foundation of your life upon the footings that your faith in God provides. The calm and strength that will settle over you, based upon that start, will carry you through the day and give you the right attitude to face whatever life throws your way.

While the future may be a bit scary, it also holds rewards for those brave enough to venture into it in search of better things. One does not find those rewards while hiding under their bed to avoid change. Be brave, be confident, be calm.

We are told in the Bible –

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. (2 Timothy 1:7)

You control your future because you control yourself and that self-control is based upon the solid foundation that you have built on the footings of your faith in God.

Have a great day at peace with yourself and in control of your future.

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Posted by Norm Werner

Reaching for the next bar…

December 29, 2020

In a recent post to his blog, Jack’s Winning Words, Pastor Freed used this quote –

‘”Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars.  You have to let go at some point in order to move forward,”  (C.S. Lewis)

I know that I’ve posted many times about letting go and moving on, but the optic of the monkey bars was too powerful to ignore.

I suppose that all of us have at one time (usually while we were very young) have been on monkey bars at a playground. Maybe as an adult, we hit something similar at a gym. When you’re a child it can look like it’s a long way to the ground and it can be scary. Sometimes we might get stranded on a bar or we can get turned upside down. Life is like that, too, and you can be left hanging upside down.

If we have lost our momentum, it can be very scary to let go with one hand and reach out with it towards the next bar. We may feel like we are losing our grip and will fall. Yet, we know that we must move forward somehow, so we must reach for the next bar or rung. We really can’t go back, because life has removed the bars behind us as we went. We also can’t remain hanging upside down or between bars. We must move on, so we must let go of the last bar.

In life that last bar may have been a strong, perhaps long relationship – a parent or a loved one whom we have lost. You can hold on to that bar in your memories, but you must let go of it in life and move on. For some, there is the pleasant surprise of finding another person with whom to share the journey ahead. For others there is contentment with a life filled with friends and perhaps children or siblings. There ae always more bars ahead to reach for, if you just let go of the past and reach out to the future.

If you feel like you are losing your grip, because of some event in your life, make the effort to reach for that next bar. You may not know what life holds for you ahead, but you can be sure that just hanging there on the bar that you are on is not the answer. Maybe that next bar is offered by an organization that helps people coping with mental anguish – reach for it. Maybe that next bar is being held out by friends and family – reach for it. Maybe that next bar is being held out by your faith in God – reach for it through prayer.  God will not let you fall. Reach for the next bar.

Reaching for the next bar…

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Posted by Norm Werner

Buying a house in winter…

December 28, 2020

I’ve posted here before about things to consider when selling your home in winter, but what about buying in winter. What things are different about the buy-side in winter?

Almost all of the differences involve differences that the winter weather imposes. For one, there is a much smaller window in which you can go visit the house while it is light out. That is important because darkness can hide many things that might otherwise influence your decision. If you only see the house in darkness times, you also won’t know how it looks when sun is streaming in through the windows (or not).

If there is snow on the ground, it might restrict your movement around the exterior of the house to look for defects or problems. Snow can also restrict your view of the roof and will prevent most home inspectors from doing a good inspection job on the roof, increasing the risk that you’ll end up with an expensive roof job in the spring. The pretty snow covers up everything, so you’ll also need to wait until spring to really see what landscaping came with the house.

There are other things that are different in the buying process in the winter month, but they all just add to the fact that the risk of something about the house surprising you in the spring is greater. Make sure that you carefully read the Seller’s Disclosure and ask questions about anything that looks alarming, especially with things that cannot be properly inspected during the winter.

Winter restricts the ability of a home inspector to properly test the HVAC system. He/she might be able to visually inspect everything in the HVAC system, but they will be unable to test the air conditioning portion, since running the air conditioner in winter can actually damage the system. Once again, you could be in for a spring surprise.

Houses with pools pose another problem, since the pool cannot be opened and the pool equipment properly inspected during the winter months. Many agent will add a pool inspection addendum to the offer which would require the seller to agree to escrow  certain amount of money and allow the pool inspection to occur after the sale when the weather permits. If problems are found later, when the pool is opened and the inspection can be done, the escrowed money is used to repair them and the balance sent to the seller. Sellers really don’t like this approach, but it is the only way to protect the interests of the buyers.

You need to be extra cautious and get a very good home inspection during the winter months. Your inspector may not be able to get up on the roof and walk around, but he/she can still get into the attic space and look for leaks or problems. When you interview them for the job, make sure that you ask about that and don’t settle for someone who says that they just open the attic access skuttle and peek in with a flashlight.

The bottom line is that there is increased risk involved with buying in the winter and you should take all of the steps that you can to reduce those risks, so that spring just brings more pleasant weather and not surprises about your new home.

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Posted by Norm Werner

Learn from it and move on

December 23, 2020

This morning I saw this quote while scrolling through Facebook posts – Never be defined by your past…it was just a lesson, not a life sentence.

The quote, which appears in multiple places, was not attributed to anyone in any of them.

There are two key things to take away from that bit of wisdom –

  1. Learn from your past, so that you don’t repeat your mistakes, and
  2. Move on from those mistakes instead of letting them hold you back or define you.

People who dwell on the past in regret or remorse can easily slip into depression, because they see no way out of the despair in which they feel that they are stuck and cannot move on.

It is important that one stop beating up themselves trying to imagine what they might have done differently to change the outcome of a situation gone bad. It happened. It is over. Now is the time to focus upon learning from it. Instead of fretting about what could I have done differently then; focus upon learning from it so that you can do differently if and when (it happens again).

Many people allow their past to define boundaries or limits on their future. For them there are places that that they do not allow themselves to go again, because the last time they went there they failed and it is was painful. They have painted themselves into a corner. For some that includes allowing themselves to love others. To love someone else is to open yourself up to the possibility and pain of rejection. However, the difference between liking and loving someone demands that level of commitment. One cannot experience the pleasure of true love, without accepting the risks inherent in laying one’s soul bare to the other party.

The other boundaries that some allow their past to define involve things like careers or sports or interpersonal relationships. I recently read a series of responses to a Facebook post made by people who had experienced prejudices based upon their past jobs. They had all been stereotyped by others because they had served as baristas in coffee shops at some point in their lives. One respondent is now a doctor and another a Vice-President of a large technology company. They refused to be confined by their past jobs.

Many people get comfortable in the niche in life that their past seemingly dictates, be it a job or a relationship. They find it easier to just continue moving in that direction, rather than exploring the possibilities that different directions offer. They are moving through life on momentum rather than making an effort to change for the better.

There was a 60’s hit by Peggy Lee titled “Is that all there is?”. The song was used on an episode of the TV show Mad Men as sort of a theme song for the malaise of the 1960’s. It is a sad and poignant story that many people who are confined by their past seem to identify with. I prefer to look ahead to new and different things and to see the world like Louis Armstrong in his song – “What a wonderful world”.

How about you? Are you confined by your past? Let go of it, because that is not all there is – there is a wonderful world out there if you just reach for it.

That is the lesson that we should all take away.

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Posted by Norm Werner

Be scared, but not fearful…

December 22, 2020

Pastor Freed used an interesting quote this morning in his blog, Jack’s Winning Words –

“There were certainly things I was scared to do, but I never thought I wasn’t up to the challenge.”  (Rodney Mara)

It is interesting because it makes one think about things that they may be scared of, but do not fear actually doing. There are many things in life today that are scary to think about. These days that may include just leaving your house to go get groceries. Yes, it is scary to think that you could get COVID-19 just shopping for your groceries, but most do not let that turn into fear of leaving their house. Rather, we use that scare to goad us into doing the right things to protect ourselves – wearing a mask, maintaining a social distance and  washing or sanitizing our hands when we exit the store.

The two words scare and fear are so intertwined that they are used in the definitions of each other; however there are subtle differences and the biggest is probably that  fear contains a large amount of imagined outcome; whereas scare is more immediate and real. Something can scare us initially, but it doesn’t necessarily turn into a fear until we’ve had time to think about it and imagine all sorts of possible bad outcomes.  A scare is more of a here and now reaction to an event, while a fear is thinking about possible future events.

Pastor Freed went on to mention that he is better able to deals with his fears by relying on his belief in God, that God is there with him, during times of stress or fear. That is certainly good advice and allows us to implement the last part of Mara’s quote in our lives – never to think that we are not up to the challenges.

If we call upon God for help and believe in Him, we quickly realize that with God at our side we are up for any challenges that come our way…we need not fear them. Many things in life are scary when we encounter them; however if we approach them with the attitude of “I’ve got this”, we can persevere. In reality, we are saying to ourselves “We’ve got this”, because we know that God is with us –

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9)

God did not say to never be scared. There are things that will scare us, as they should. However, we do not have to let that scare turn into fears that control our lives. Rather than being anxious and fearful when encountering something scary, heed the words of John and be at peace –

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” (John 14:27)

The next time you encounter something scary, instead of letting that initial fright turn into a fear, quickly find your inter-peace, your faith.  Rather than sinking into the paralysis of fear, you will see that your faith calms the situation and allows you to think clearly about what you should do to address the situation. Your faith allows you to maintain control of yourself in the situation, whereas fear would try to control you.

Have a great and fear-free day. God is with you. Be not afraid.

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Posted by Norm Werner

I found the right words…

December 21, 2020

“One day I will find the right words, and they will be simple.”  (Jack Kerouac-poet) –  From a recent post to the Jack’s Winning Ways blog. Pastor Freed when on to write about trying to be brief in his blog,

I guess I cannot claim to be brief in this blog. I often take the one-paragraph posts that I see in Pastor Freed blog and turn them into 4-5 paragraphs (sometimes more). One reader even commented that it was like encountering a “wall of words.” Ouch!

OK, so, I get wordy most of the time. Sorry about that, but I love words and how one can flow them together to express a thought. Maybe I should stop thinking so much and that might cut down the number of words needed. My wife accuses me (and rightfully so most of the time) of being too much like Captain Obvious too much of the time.

The one area of my life that I have found the right words (at least for me) that are simple and short is in my prayers. I have posted this here a few times that my favorite and most often used prayer is the simple line – “Not my will, but Thy will be done.”

I think the reason that I love that simple little prayer is that it represents a release of my own ego and an acceptance of the will of God in my life, no matter what the situation is that is prompting the prayer. I have also posted here many times about how one’s inability to let go of the need to solve a problem or work out an issue can get in the way of moving forward – see Let it Go. Spit it out.

There are times when I use others prayers, especially when I remember to stop and thank God for some wonderful thing that has just happened or some terrible thing that I just avoided; but that is my “go-to” prayer.

I’m sure that many people have their own “go-to” prayer; but if you don’t have one, feel free to use my little prayer. It works wonders for me and will put you in the right frame of mind to experience wonders in your life, too.

Have a great week ahead. It’s Christmas week and a time to celebrate.

May His will be done in your life.

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Posted by Norm Werner

But, it’s not an automatic door…

December 17, 2020

Pastor Freed used this quote today in his blog, Jack’s Winning Words –“Every wall has a door.”  (Emerson) 

That quote gets used a lot in inspirational posts or signs and is meant to encourage people to not quit, but to look for the way out of the situation that they find themselves in – to look for that door. Pastor Freed went on to relate how Michael Jordan used it to explain that he never quit when he had early rejections or failures in life – he found a way through, or over, or around the walls that life threw up in his life.

I suspect that many of us approach those doors like we would the door of a major retail store, like Kohl’s or Target. We expect them to be automatic, to open as we approach them. Most are not that way. The doors to opportunity in life require not only that you look for them; but, also that you actually work to get them open and go through them.

Some doors may even be locked when we get there and we have the further challenge of finding the key to unlock them, so that we may open them and go through. Some doors are even hidden. I saw a post on Linked In recently were a man approached a wall that had an obvious door in it, but he pushed on the seemingly solid stone wall next to the door and a passageway opened for his to go through. Maybe the message there is that one must also look for hidden solutions to life’s problems and challenges.

What do you do when you walk up to the storefront door and it doesn’t automatically open? Do you give up, turn around and go back to your car? No. You reach out, grab the door handle and open it yourself.

The doors the we may face in life are not automatic and we must work to find and open them, so that we might go forward in life. The important take-away is to not allow yourself to be satisfied with being shut out of what’s behind each door that is preventing your progress.

This morning, in your prayers, ask God, not that He make the doors that you encounter in life open automatically; but, rather for His help in finding the key needed to open them and allow you to move on with your life. Ask Him to strengthen your faith and give you the patience and perseverance to work at opening those doors.  We read in the Bible –

“For whatever is born of God overcomes the world; and this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith.” (1 John 5:4)

If you think about it, God has already given us the ultimate key to life’s last door – Jesus. For, with faith in Jesus, we can open the door in the wall of death and enter into eternal life.

Keep working at it through prayer. It is not an automatic door.

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Posted by Norm Werner

Find your calm…

December 16, 2020

In a recent Church Council meeting our Pastor used the following quote –

 “Fear sees a threat, anxiety images it” (Max Lucado from his book Anxious for Nothing: Finding Calm in a Chaotic World)

Lucado is a Christian author and speaker who used that phrase back in 2017 as part of a Bible study presentation about Paul’s letter to the Philippians Chapter 4 verses 6-7, in which Paul said “be anxious about nothing.” You can read all about Max Lucado and see the books that he has written at maxlucado.com.

He went on to say, “The presence of anxiety is unavoidable, but the prison of anxiety is optional. It’s the life of perpetual anxiety that Paul wants to address. Don’t let anything in life leave you perpetually in angst.”

How prophetic were Paul’s words (and those of Lucado) when viewed from the context or our current pandemic environment. We can’t see the threat that the COVID-19 virus presents, we only see the results in the nightly news show; so our anxiety takes over and we imagine the threat as it might apply to us personally.

I have often written here about what I called “the dungeon of despair”, which Lucado calls the “prison of anxiety”. This is a mental prison, not a physical one; but it is a bad place to allow yourself to become trapped, nonetheless.

Lucado talks of the key to being calm in the face of a chaotic world is found in one’s faith. If anxiety imagines a threat where none can be seen, faith provides the calm place to go in the midst of that anxiety. Anxiety tries to cause us to see nowhere to turn in the face of the threat, but the Bible tells us –

“Don’t fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine.” (Isaiah 43:1)

And

“He will never leave you nor forsake you.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” (Deuteronomy 31:8)

Sometimes we need a simple way to envision God’s love and care for us. Maybe you can find that by visualizing this passage from Isaiah 49:16 – “I have written your name on the palms of my hand.”

Just imagine God walking around with your name tattooed in the palm of his hand. Find comfort and calm in the thought that God is holding you in the palm of his hands and then say to yourself – If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31)

Don’t let fear take over and lead to anxiety; rather, find your calm in the midst of the current chaos by using your imagination to strengthen your faith. Visualize your name written in the palm of God’s hand. Imagine that!

Be at peace.

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Posted by Norm Werner

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