“Am I my brother’s keeper?” (Cain’s answer to God) – as seen on the Jack’s Winning Words blog.
Tis the season to be generous, so perhaps you have put your change into a red kettle at the mall or sent in a donation to one of the many requests that arrive in the mail this time of year. That makes you feel good and feel good about yourself, for a while. What about the rest of the year? Do you 
ask yourself the same question as Cain did? Are you your brother’s keeper? Is it up to you to give, to volunteer, to make a difference?
We live in a time of declining government help and funding to provide for the needs of the disadvantaged. It’s a time when our elected officials seem more interested in arguing with each other than providing help for those in need. Cutbacks in public spending for everything from mental health care to providing basic services has shifted the burden of caring for those in need to the private sector – to churches and volunteer assistance groups. I wrote about one such group in this area called S.A.L . – Supportive Assisted Living – that provides needed services to allow developmentally challenged adults to live in homes of their own. You can read what I wrote about the group here.
S.A.L. is just one of the many groups at work in our community providing the services and help that are needed and filling the voids left by our uncaring and ineffective governments. They truly take on the role of their brother’s keepers. S.A.L. can use your help as a volunteer or paid staff and certainly as a donor. Other groups, like Community Sharing, the Red Cross
and local churches provide clothing, food, shelter and services to those in
need. We see snippets on the news and then they quickly fade away. What happens to those people when they get back home with their bags of groceries or that new coat? Do we really think that everything will be OK now? We did our part; we delivered the Thanksgiving bag of groceries; now we can get back to our lives. That’s not how life works.
Groups like S.A.L. are there every day, day in and day out; providing the daily care and guidance and support that their clients need. It is that role that has been abandoned by government – the role of my brother’s keeper. S.A.L. does receive some funding through various government programs, but that funding is constantly being cut. Now, you may say; “Well that’s not government’s role”; to which I would rely, “If not the government, then who?” After all, our “government” is supposedly 
representing we the people. So it is us who are abandoning those in need when the government abandons them. If your argument is that, “government can’t afford to provide those services”; then how do expect charities to afford to do so when you abandon that responsibility? After all, charities are funded by whom – we the people.
This all leads me to the question that serves as today’s title – if not me, then who? Who is going to provide the funding and the services, if I don’t? Who is going to step up and volunteer, if I don’t? Who is going to vote for better politicians who will care about the real issue in our society, if I 
don’t? Who will run for those offices and do that better job, if I don’t? You see, it always comes down to the individual. Who else will be inspired to take action if I don’t? Can you answer that question in your life? Do you even ask? Who will if you don’t?
Be your brother’s keeper today – give, call, volunteer, make a difference. If not you, then who? If you want to support the efforts of S.A.L., click here.
Posted by Norm Werner 
scene on the stairs of the original movie Nightmare on Elm Street?)
Windows Live Mail is what I use to run my real estate business and all of my old real estate deal email files were now unavailable to me (the use of Windows Live Mail is a problem of my own making that I need to address). Admittedly it was also my own fault for not doing more research into what issue and problems come with this upgrade. Every few years I forget how Microsoft operates and how little they seem to care about the disruption that things like their upgrades and updates often cause.
software or its upgrades and updates has caused me some tech person from Microsoft will email me or comment on my post to tell me that I should have done this or that to fix the problem. My reply is that I should not have had the problem in the first place. There should be clear warnings as part of the upgrade process that let users know that various things that worked for them under their old operating system version likely won’t work after the upgrade. The upgrade does say that all of the files will still be there and that most applications will still work; but there is no guidance on apps known not to work after the upgrade.
folders files and contacts from the old system (perhaps along with calendar information), since those files are still there – maybe even a Wizard to help. Telling me after the fact how I can work some more to recover from a problem that your update or upgrade caused doesn’t cut it. That is not productive use of my time.
Those two quotes both point to the fact that the answers we seek that lead to a sense of well-being is inside of us. We must make peace with ourselves and then we will be able to find happiness.
inward to that place in your heart where peace and happiness reside. Linger there for a while and when you return find someone else to share your peace with and let them see your happiness. Maybe that will help them find out what’s in their heart, too.
What I like about this quote is that it is actionable. It doesn’t just say sit there and wait if you want an opportunity, build a door for it to knock upon. That may mean taking classes or doing the prep work that is needed to be ready. It may mean putting in the extra effort that gets noticed when opportunity arrives. It could mean doing some of the things that you really don’t like to do, because opportunity demands that they be done first.
else or maybe something like a better job. The gap represents either skills and knowledge that we don’t have or maybe just self-confidence that we lack. The gap may be relatively narrow or very wide, but we feel stuck on one side and what we want is on the other side.
So, the point is that we must make the effort. Things are not going to fall into our laps just because we sit around lamenting what we don’t have. Build a bridge or a door. Get up and do something to move towards your goals and improve your chances of success. Find joy in the effort and take to heart the words of Theodore Roosevelt –
A hug instantaneously takes us back to the time when our mother’s warm embrace seemed to solve all problems, ease all pains and make all boo-boos feel better. Those hugs may even transport us back to the warm safety of the womb and all was OK again.
not be standing there in the street with a blindfold on and a sign that says “hug me”; but you can probably still identify that stressed or distressed look in their eyes that is screaming “HUG ME” just and surely as if they had that sign. Don’t avoid them. Give them that hug and an amazing thing will happen – you’ll get a hug back and your day will be letter, too.
energy flow into them. Tears may follow, or smiles; but, whatever is next is better than what was there before. Your hug has unlocked them and let them go on. Your hug has also unlocked you. Allow yourself to feel good about it. Soon you will be seeking other opportunities to hug someone, because it makes both of your day’s better.
As young children we tend to use the whole box of crayons and we don’t worry all that much about staying within the lines either. We just experience life as it comes, without prejudices or pre-conceived notions. As we get older, “adults” around us start “explaining” things to us. They give us the rules that they say we should live by. They start taking away some of our crayons. As they work to make us “safer”, things can begin to get a bit duller. There are fewer crayon colors and they are less vibrant. As time goes on, and as we add more and more rules to our lives. Things can become more shades of gray than vibrant colors. For a few, things even lose the shades and everything becomes black and white.
lack of understanding, there grows confusion and eventually fear.
decide to throw away the crayons of people who look and talk like them, but who have a different lifestyle or perhaps just a difference of religion or even politics – the picture just got even grayer. Finally they decide that things really can be defined only as right or wrong by their standards; that there is no need for shades of gray; that everything can be colored as black and white.
ethnic restaurant visit. There is art and music, literature and language, traditions and customs that all use different crayons to render life in new colors. So get out of your grey zone of comfort; break out the crayon box and use all of the colors. What you’ll discover is a beautiful rainbow of experiences and a more colorful and satisfying life.
I’ve written a lot here about service to others as being a noble and worthwhile goal, but it is also a path to joy, as was expressed well by Rabindranath Tagore –
-responders. There are always people who jump into action to help in any emergency. They may just provide welcoming and comforting arms to hug a frightened person or they may end up covered with blood as they try to help the wounded or injured. The key is that they act. They are helpers.
news. Someone comes into work the day after breaking up a relationship. You meet a homeless person on the street.An elderly neighbor slips and falls and is laid up in their home. Someone spills their drink all over themselves at a restaurant. A lady with two small children in tow is trying to load up a big box into her car. A small child waits nervously to cross a busy street. A friend confides that he/she has a terminal disease or that they have just received an eviction notice on their home.
ls0 jump in to see if there is anything that you can do, too? You will never have to think back and say I coulda, woulda, shoulda, and then feel guilty; if you do the right thing to begin with and try to help.
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