Your mom was right. Be nice to people…

From the Jack’s Winning Words blog of today comes this quote – “Be nice to people…maybe it will be unappreciated, unreciprocated or ignored, but spread love anyway.  We rise by lifting others.”  (Germany Kent)

I’ve never quite understood those who see life as a zero-sum game in which they only win if others lose. They are people who are sometimes generously called “competitive” by others. They see no value in lifting up others, but would rather climb failureshigher by climbing over the backs of others. They see others as losers or obstacles to be overcome, defeated or discarded. Theirs is truly a sad existence.

Jack went on to comment that Google had done a study that showed that teams in business made up of people who liked and supported each other generally did better than teams made up of “competitive” people. I’ve gone through enough team building exercises in my business career to realize that finding a way to recognize and use the unique talents that each individual brings to the group makes for a stronger and more successful team.

Another saying from an earlier post to Jack’s blog also seems appropriate within the context of this discussion on being nice to others –

“The only moral lesson which is suited for a child—the most important lesson for every time of life—is this: Never hurt anybody.”  (Rousseau)

predjuicesThe inverse of being nice to others is most often causing them some hurt, whether it be just their feelings or otherwise. Dismissing the abilities and contributions of others is hurtful to them and, in the long run, to the efforts of the team. Ignoring others points of view or their questions about your point of view on things is missing valuable feedback. If nothing else, a questions that seems to be based upon not understanding what you have in mind clearly points out that you have not been able to articulate your point of view or plan. If the person questioning your plan has those doubts or misunderstandings, then others will too and you need to rethink either the plan itself or how you explain it to others. That is a valuable insight that you need to take into consideration.

Stepping out of the business world, it is important that we each do our part in making the world a better place. That starts by how you interact with those around you during the day. I thought of an analogy that is based on some video games that I’ve played in the past. Some of them had little “health meters” embedded in them that showed the relativemeter-healthy health of the participant. These were games in which you could find things that improved your health or things could happen to you which took away from your health. You could always tell whether something happening in the game was adding to or detracting from your health.

Life is a little like those games. As you meet people during the day, do those encounters add to or detract from your state of mind (your “health”)? What does someone encountering you get from it – an addition to their health or a downer that takes away from their mental health? That part is up to you and that is where being nice to others comes in. Being nice to others is not a passive thing; it requires work on your part. Showing them love means showing them the respect to listen to what they have to say, when you ask, “How are you?” Being nice means pausing from your busy schedule to take those moments to interact with them in a way that is more meaningful than a tossed off greeting as you pass on the street. Being nice means that you give them a lift on their “health meter” and hopefully you see a rise on your meter, too.

So, be aware of the potential impact that you could have on others this week, both positive and negative. Go out and be nice; spread the love and move their health meters up, always aware that your health meter will be rising, too.

Have a great and healthy week! Be nice to people.

 

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