“Everything will be all right in the end. If it’s not all right, it’s not the end.” (From The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel–British Film), as seen on the Jack’s Winning Words blog.
I like that line from the movie because underlying it is the thought to never give up, never quit, never reach the end until things are all right – until you have reached whatever goal that you had for that situation. That doesn’t necessarily always have to be a win; it just has to be an outcome that you are happy or satisfied with at the time.
In recent World Cup matches, playing to a tie, scoreless or otherwise in some matches was all right – the team still advanced in many of those cases. In life coming to a point in which neither side has to feel a loss is all right, too. Sometimes that is a win-win situation, where both sides feel like they scored a win in the deal (which is what we strive for in the real estate business); and sometimes it’s just deciding to quit while neither side is “ahead” and declaring a truce on whatever issue was driving the battle (a good strategy in marriage many time).
The alternative to accepting a tie or achieving a win-win is the dark side of this little saying. That occurs when people focus on an end-game that requires revenge. Seeking revenge means that the game can never be over, since one side or the other will be put in the position of having to get even again. That is a no-win game that should be avoided. For some people it is hard to find a way to stop that cycle, to call a truce and abandon the revenge game. For them, that would feel like a loss, which of course they have been fighting to avoid. For most, perhaps it involves embracing the concept of forgiveness. Here’s a good quote that I found about that –
“Forgiving isn’t something you do for someone else. It’s something you do for yourself. It’s saying, ‘You’re not important enough to have a stranglehold on me.’ It’s saying, ‘You don’t get to trap me in the past. I am worthy of a future.” ― Jodi Picoult, The Storyteller
If you think about that little quote, it is allowing you declare a win to yourself while reaching a draw on whatever issue has been driving the relationship between you and the other party. You have forgiven them for whatever you believe they did or whatever position they have taken. Boy, will that frost their patootie. Now, in order to get revenge they’ll have to forgive you, too. Maybe you can have a contest now to see who is the most forgiving of the other. All right then, it’s not the end until everything all right.
Getting back on the plus-side of life; there are things in life that will never be all right – homelessness, hunger, abuse, discrimination and more; so, there will always be things that you can continue to work on making right. You can join the efforts in service with other volunteers to deal with those issues and always have something to keep you busy. At the end of each day you will have a reason to get up the next day and continue the battle, because it’s not all right yet, so it’s not over.
Maybe you can’t tackle world hunger or homelessness or abuse and bullying, but you can do something about them where you live and wrestling them down to zero in your town or village or city will feel like a major win. All you have to do is look around you and see the things that aren’t right and then start doing something about them. Start today. Start on your block and work your way out from there.
Remember that it’s not over yet because everything is not all right. You can make the difference.